Government jokes
Random person: We are taking away your freedoms to keep you safe.
Hitla: That's exactly what I said.
What's the difference between me and the rest of America?
I love one and hate the other.
Russia is worse than the USSR.
Russia is just a bonerless USSR.
According to unofficial sources, a new simplified income-tax form contains only four lines:
1. What was your income for the year?
2. What were your expenses?
3. How much have you left?
4. Send it in.
"Ahoy, Spongebob! I just committed homicide in Syria, and the one-party state is after my fucking ass! Argagagagagaga!"
Republicans were quick to admit however, that the 22nd Amendment was passed in a stolen election to remove FDR.
Queen, (DYM 86)
So an ace gets handed a piece of paper and it says, "Do you like me or no?" and the ace says, "I'm not registered to vote!" Hahahahahahahahjajqh.
Labor party.
How would Stephen Hawking get rid of the police?
Go to the junkyard.
Who's the cutest president in the world?
Kim Jong Un, chh💕💕💕
King.
Jason Kenney has never worried about putting food on the table for his kids.
"Knuckle babies" don't eat.
Do you know why people in wheelchairs don’t pay for them?
Because they have to pay for road tax.
When people are ready to die for their country:
Trust the Unionist Party.
Better than Reform.
Biden and Trump.
That's it. That's the joke.
As the coronavirus pandemic strengthens...
Trump - "Quick, inject yourselves with bleach!"
Also Trump - "I order everyone in America to wear a face mask except for me!"
A man goes into the streets of Moscow and yells, “I am tired of this guy with a silly mustache and stupid rules being a leader!”
A soldier heard him, so he goes and catches him. Later, he brings the man to Stalin. The soldier says to Stalin what happened and Stalin asks the man, “Who were you thinking about when you yelled in the streets?”
The man responds, “Of course, I was thinking about Hitler!”
Stalin lets him go, but then he stops the soldier and says, “Who were YOU thinking about?”
Kim Jong-Un thicc af.
"Bippity Boppity Boo, Donald Trump is gonna deport you!"
What do you call a dictatorial cow?
Moosilini.