Go Jokes

My grandma was telling me to be positive. As i was going in for an aids test

im sorry orphans that your getting bullyed.. oh i have to go my MOM's calling me WERE going on a road trip to go to a FAMILY reuonion

This joke includes potentially sensitive content.

2. Are you a haunted house? Because I’m going to scream when I’m in you 😫

why couldn't the orphan go on the school field trip

because it required a parents signature

Why do fathers take an extra pair of socks when they go golfing?" "In case they get a hole in one!

I’m going to open my own Mexican restaurant and call it boarder patrol

I was thrown out of the charity food kitchen on my first night of volunteering.

All I said was, hurry up, some of us got homes to go to...

I went to a birthday party and told dad jokes

The jokes didn't go over well. I was asked to leave the orphanage

Me going to jail for telling the orphan he has 363 days because mothers and Father’s Day

What does a race track and your hairline have in common? They both go up and down.

I wasn’t planning on going for a run today, but those cops came out of nowhere

Two terrorists walk into a bar. The bartender asks what they are talking about. Terrorist 1 says “We are going to kill 14k people and a donkey” The Bartender asks “Why a donkey?” Then Terrorist 2 says “See, I told you no one would care about the 14k people.”

I’m going to open a wellness center for ASD kids to be able to express themselves through music and painting. I will call it Artism!

There are Three Sons Journey Korean and Little Joe. They were trapped on a floating island and a priest gave them each one wish the first son wished to go back to the ground. The Second Son wished to go back to the ground. The third son was lonely and wished for his two brothers to come back to the floating island.

A bus full of Nuns falls of a cliff and they all die. They arrive at the gates of heaven and meet St. Peter. St. Peter says to them “Sisters, welcome to Heaven. In a moment I will let you all though the pearly gates, but before I may do that, I must ask each of you a single question. ”

St. Peter turns to the first Nun in the line and asks her “Sister, have you ever touched a penis?” The Sister Responds “Well... there was this one time... that I kinda sorta... touched one with the tip of my pinky finger...” St. Peter says “Alright Sister, now dip the tip of your pinky finger in the Holy Water, and you may be admitted.” and she did so.

St. Peter now turns to the second nun and says “Sister, have you ever touched a penis?” “Well.... There was this one time... that I held one for a moment...” “Alright Sister, now just wash your hands in the Holy Water, and you may be admitted” and she does so.

Now at this, there is a noise, a jostling in the line. It seems that one nun is trying to cut in front of another! St. Peter sees this and asks the Nun “Sister Susan, what is this? There is no rush!” Sister Susan responds “Well if I’m going to have to gargle this stuff, I’d rather do it before Sister Mary sticks her ass in it!”

Yesterday, I was babysitting this woman's child. Everything was going perfectly. I got hungry and called the mother. I asked if she wanted the baby back ribs I was cooking but she said she didn't want any. When she arrived she started screaming and ran to her child. I don't see why she was so upset, she said she didn't want any.

One day 2 Chinese with broken English go to America. When they arrive they go to a small place to eat. When they look at the menu they see "hot dog" but since there English is bad, they think its literally a roasted dog and order it. When it comes back there both surprised and one of them ask "What part of the dog did you get."

So some ants in a colony go to war. they want some more troops and know that there are ants that went to wars as well. They call them war-ants. they start barging into home's to search for more war-ants. They barge into a home and the lady-ant goes "Hey. why are you here? Can you please leave?" One of the ants reply with "I'm sorry, but unless you have a war-ant, we have to keep searching your house"