Go jokes

I would go suck some titties, but I’d rather die from being shot than cancer.

I walked into an orphanage and a kid was crying. I asked him what was wrong and he said some kids were bullying him. I told him to go tell his parents.

Why couldn't the orphan go on the school field trip?

Because it required a parent's signature.

An e-girl went to go high five a tree, but the tree left her hanging.

How do you get an orphan to go to sleep?

Tell them their parents are waiting when they wake up.

My grandma was telling me to be positive, as I was going in for an AIDS test.

My ceiling fan isn't the only thing that's going to be hanging tonight.

What's an orphan's favorite game?

"Who's your daddy?"

(Go look up the game)

My friend said they were going to make a comeback. I told them to do it at the back of the throat.

I can go to Walmart and scan my wrists. It'll say "antidepressants." ✨

Why do fathers take an extra pair of socks when they go golfing?

In case they get a hole in one!

The terrorists said over the intercom, "We're coming up to our destination, so we can't go over it, we can't go under, we have to go through it."

There was one kid that came home from school and asked his mom what dark humor was.

She said, "Well son, do you see that guy over there across the road? Go give him a high-five."

Son said, "But I can't see."

Mom said, "That's the point."

What do orphans and police not have in common?

The police can actually go home.

If you're American when you go in the bathroom and you're American when you come out, what are you in the bathroom?

European.

Me vs. the emo kid: we go to high-five a tree. I get a high five; the emo kid is left hanging.

Is it possible for an orphan to go on an away trip?

No, because they already are on one.

I was making love to this girl, and she started crying. I said, “Are you going to hate yourself in the morning?” She said, “No, I hate myself now.”

– Rodney Dangerfield

The emo kid said, "I wanna die." But the quiet kid said, "Nah, I'm gonna die myself, bye!"

I'm sorry, orphans, that you're getting bullied. Oh, I have to go, my MOM's calling me. We're going on a road trip to go to a FAMILY reunion!