Girl jokes
I met a lovely girl at a friend's house party, so I went and introduced myself by saying I'm Noah, what's yours?
She turned around angrily and offended and said, "I identify as a hockey puck, didn't you see the sign?"
To which I replied, "Bitch, that says hickey puck. If you identify as a hockey puck, then let me hit you!"
I met a lovely girl at a friend's house party, so I went and introduced myself by saying I'm Noah, what's yours?
She turned around angrily and offended and said, "I identify as a hockey puck, didn't you see the sign?"
To which I replied, "Bitch, that says hickey puck. If you identify as a hockey puck, then let me hit you!"
Pick up line for girls with the last name "Berg":
"I may be a tall glass of whiskey, but I'm nothing without a few ice Bergs."
Do this on a calculator.
There was this girl who was (13) but she wanted to be (84) but she was (45) but the doctor said (0). He said take these tablets (2x) a day, but she took them (4x) a day, and she ended up boobless.
Do you want to hear three jokes?
Joke Joke Joke.
A father of a young girl comes and meets the doctor.
Father: Doctor, how is my daughter's report?
Doctor: Congrats, your daughter is pregnant.
Father: WTF ?????? My daughter is 10 years old and unmarried.
One day, Johnny told his dad that a girl in his class liked him. He thought she was cute. She said, "Aw, you're like candy!" He didn't say anything. He said, "Why don't you think I am sweet like candy?" Little Johnny said, "Well, sometimes I get a toothache, and it hurts, so I stop eating it, like I stopped liking you."
Girl: Can we visit Grandma this weekend?
Mother: Sure.
Five-year-old: Look mommy! Two people and they're wearing rope necklaces!
Your mum was so poor that she went to rob the bank, but she left because she couldn't find the cameras. She left her son, and the security [girl] gave him the camera.
Make this the most liked comment!
(I'm a girl btw)
;)
Why do men lick girls' boobs in sex?
'Cause they are just boys.
Boys are like minis.
Girls are like big pots.
Minis always come first. Don't think about sex boys, be men.
You know why they call me 007?
0 girls.
0 chances.
7 restraining orders.
Friend: My girls are like boomerangs; they always come back.
Me: Mine DON'T :(
Why couldn't the girl with no arms hug her parents?
Because she had none of the above.
At night, before I got in bed with my girl, I had 206 bones, but I developed a 207th bone.
One day I was at school, and this girl had the nerve. She told me to go to the back of the line. I was looking behind me, and she said, "What are you looking for?" I said, "To who [are] you talking to, boo boo?" Like, is you you my momma?
Orphan: Let's play baseball!
Girl: No, you can't.
Orphan: Why?
Girl: Because you can't find home.
A girl has small balls.
I heard China aborts 25% of female babies. That's a lot of dead 3-year-old gender-affirmed girls.