Girl jokes

You know why Santa's saying is "Ho Ho Ho?"

How else is he supposed to give boys and girls a baby brother or sister for Christmas?

I bet emo girls get jealous when people cut paper.

A boy walks up to a girl and says, "I would tell you a joke about my dick, but it’s too long."

Then the girl says, "Yeah, I would tell you a joke about my pussy, but you’ll never get it."

An emo girl jumped out of a tree at the same time a feather fell to the ground... What hit the ground first?

The feather, the girl was stopped by a rope.

Yesterday I asked an emo girl if she's jealous when her phone dies.

Hey girl, are you my boss? 'Cause you just gave me a raise.

How do you tell the difference between a girl spaghetti and a boy spaghetti?

Meatballs.

What hits the ground first, an apple or an emo girl?

The rope would catch her.

One time there was a depressed man standing in the middle of a train track. A girl said, "Excuse me, can you move, please? I'm trying-" Then the man stopped her sentence and said, "How is your t-shirt so clean?" Then she said back, "Easy, hung it up."

"WASSUP GIRLS IF I FIND YOU I'LL GLADLY FUCK YOU;]"

I was at a bar. The girl said, "Sex, sex, free sex tonight," when she really said, "663629."

Been single for a couple of years and then I met this Muslim girl. She soon put the spark back into things.

So I was living with a girl for a few weeks, and it was nice until she found out that I was there.

A girl in my class started barking, and I yelled out, "Furry!" Everyone started laughing at her, and I felt bad. After school, I asked to drive her home, and one the way there I apologized and then told her to count down from 10 - 1. Before she said one, I yelled, "THERE CAN BE ONLY ONE!" then I jumped out the car.

Girls are like numbers squared. If they're under 13, just do 'em in your head.

Me: I saw your parents yesterday.

Orphan girl: Where?

Me: The coffin was still open.

Short girl: "How do you see up there?"

Tall guy: "Who said that?"

I spit my drink out and then ran away.

I was walking and I saw a girl crying, and she told me to take her dollhouse and I asked why. She said because I don't have one.

Why do skeletons like having sex with short girls before eating?

They like to bone a petite.

What did the girl and the orphan have in common? Their parents weren't home.