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Did Mr. Rusher play tennis in the dark?
You will get hit by the tennis ball! Ouch, Mr. Rusher said.
My sister was getting something from the basement, and seeing rats, she said: "Rats are so disgusting and ugly."
I turned to her, "Sis, self-hate is not okay."
What time is it when you get hit by a car? Time to die.
What is the difference between an apple and an orphan? Apples get picked.
Why do cantaloupes always get married in the church?
'Cause they can't elope.
I was being interviewed by Elon Musk. He asked, "Where are you from?" and I said Portugal. He replied, "So you are a fellow countryman of a Pen merchant whose freekick ball broke my rover on Mars. Get out!!" Tears ran down my face. Shame on you, Penaldo, for costing me my dream job!
Why are bald people very easily manipulated by a shower?
Because when they take a bath, they get brainwashed!
How is tightrope walking like getting a blowjob from someone ugly?
If you want to enjoy either, you absolutely can’t look down.
What was the difference between the Federal Republic of Germany and the German Democratic Republic?
Federal Republic: The harder you work, the more you get.
Democratic Republic: The harder you work, the firmer the handshake and nothing else.
My grandfather killed Hitler.
Get it? Get it?
My mom told me to get dressed, and I said, "For what? Are we going to the rodeo?"
The Flanders Song
God said to Noah, "There’s gonna be a floody-floody."
Rain came down, it started to get muddy-muddy.
Get these animals👏out of the arky-arky."
"Leave me alone!"
I asked the emo girl if she gets jealous when her phone dies.
Biden... get it?
Why did the chicken cross the plane to get to the other skyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy lloooooooooooooooooooool?
Why don’t Indians play soccer?
Cos every time they get a corner, they open a shop.
Q. What do ghosts do when they get hurt?
A. They call an AmBOOlance.
I went on a date with an Eastern European chick. She got mad because I rushed her...
Get it? It's Russia, and I rushed her.
What did the orphan get for Christmas? Nothing, they haven't got family.
Rapboat has to drug his own drink to get laid.