Get jokes

My grandfather killed Hitler.

Get it? Get it?

Yo mama so fat, she had to have 5 doorways to get anywhere!

What is the difference between an emo kid and a jug of milk?

The milk doesn't hang itself after it gets dumped.

Q: What do bloods eat when they get sick?

A: Chicken noodle suwoop.

I bought my fat wheelchair son a treadmill for his birthday, then that big brainless special motherfucker cried over it and threw a fit cuz his fat special ass couldn't get up out of his wheelchair and said for Jesus to raise him up and give him working and movable legs.

Witches do not wear undies. Why? To get a better grip on their broomsticks.

What do you call a rapper who CAN’T GET OUT OF BED IN THE MORNING?

Snooze Dogg.

I tried to get into an emo bar, but I didn't make the cut.

Normally the reason you don't get a knife when you ask for one is because the person you asked is emo.

So, three guys are walking carefully into a bar.

The bartender said, "What can I get you, gentlemen?"

Your mama is so stupid she stayed up all night so she can get some sleep.

Why did the chef go get the eggs? Because eggs are egg-tastic!

Your mama is so fat, I had to look twice to get a first impression.

Okay, so I have a dairy and sugar allergy, and if I eat it, I get REALLY CONSTIPATED, so this is me when I’m constipated ᕙ(⇀‸↼‵‵)ᕗ lol.

Yo mama is so pretty, she could get in a car crash because boys are staring at her.

What do school shooting jokes and school shooting victims have in common? They never get old.

Science experts say when you get mad, punch an orphan. What are they going to do? Tell their parents?

What's the best way to get an emo out of a tree?

Cut the rope.

What sits in the corner and gets smaller and smaller? A baby with a potato peeler.

Son: Dad, what are those two huge balloons on mommy's chest?

Dad: I don't see balloons, but I see boobs. I mean, yes, balloons.

Son: Are you sure they're balloons? Yesterday I heard Uncle Frank trying to get a milk dispenser working.