Get jokes
Why was Stephen Hawking late to the NASA meeting?
He couldn't get up the kerb.
A sailor drops anchor in a port and heads into the nearest pub. Everyone in the pub is whispering and pointing at him because of his odd shaped body; he has a very muscular body, but a very tiny head on his shoulders.
As he orders his drink, he tells the bartender, "I'll explain. I get this in every port and town I visit. I caught a mermaid and she granted me three wishes if I would release her back into the sea. So I told her I wanted a yacht and, sure enough, she came through for me. Next, I asked for a million bucks and now I am set for life. Last of all, I asked her if I could have sex with her and her response was, 'I don't know how you can make love to me with your type of body.' So I asked her, 'How about a little head?'"
Hello, Brudas, my name Badabeeyeabolamazoqanba. I, forty-eight-year man from Somalia. Sorry for bad England. I sold my wife for internet connect, and I am level thirteen in Roblacks. If you want to get batter in Roblacks, contact me at Gmail@borakoobama. Send me your bank account information and password. Than I well give you all the cotton you desire. Sorry for bad spelling. I kindergarden dropout.
How do you get a blonde to drown?
Stick a mirror at the bottom of a pool.
Why did the booty get a job?
To make ends meet!
What makes you guys high?
I get high when I have a dead fish in my lunchbox.
Random words in my keyboard:
The most annoying part of this game has always been that the players don’t know how much time it takes to get to the table before you start playing them.
A girl in the shop was getting bullied. She came to me saying, "I’m getting bullied." I told her, "Stand up for herself."
Roses are red,
My nuts are bigger than your small balls, that's why I get all the bitches.
Why do men midgets laugh when they run?
Because their balls get tickled by the grass.
Muslims don't need weed, they've got the Koran.
You burn that sh*t and you're gonna get stoned.
Getting a book on pasta?
Yes. Just imagine the pastabilities there are!
Alright, my sister is ALWAYS dancing randomly all the time, and what I say is, "Go get you boyfriend, dude!"
Why did the chicken cross the road?
To get to his job at KFC!
Why don't orphans play GTA?
Because they're sad they don't get wanted!
What's the difference between an apple and an orphan?
An apple gets picked.
Why can't orphans play Monopoly?
Because they never get a full house.
Say "Mike Wizowski" fast to a teenager and I will get you $100000000000.
If you wait for a woman to get 9 months pregnant and kill her, you will never be able to stop the loop.
Teacher: Students, tomorrow bring your parents to the open house.
Student one orphan: I don't have any.
Student 2: What is the difference between you and an escaped prisoner?
Student one orphan: What!
Student 2: The prisoner gets picked.