Get jokes
What did the South tower get instead of pepperoni pizza?
It got a bunch of plane.
When I feel ugly, I just look at my brother and get over it.
What kind of shirts does Sally's parents get her?
Long sleeves.
What time is it when you can smell smoke inside?
Time to get outside!
Why did the football coach go to the bank?
To get his quarterback!
If you ever get mad at an orphan, punch them in the face... What are they going to do, tell their parents?
What is David Bowie known for when making music? He gets his beats from his kids.
Why did the chicken cross the road?
Heehheehehehehehehe
To get to the other side. Ahaahahahahahahahahahahaa!
Whoever invented the knock-knock joke should get a "no bell" prize.
Why do golfers bring an extra pair of socks? In case they get a hole in one.
If the average male walks 1.7 miles a day, then why did my dad take 13 years to get the milk?
Why did the lady go to the dealership? Because she was going to get Hereford.
What do you get when you cross a donkey with an onion?
A piece of ass that makes your eyes water.
What do you get when you cross a rooster with a small dog?
A Cock-a-POODLE-Doo!
Friend: If you could get rid of any one person in your life, who would it be?
Me: Me.
Friend: *does nothing*
(x_x)
I forgot that I don't have friends.
I love your hair today.
How did you get it to come out your nose like that?
I was at work and then a little kid came up to me and she said, "What happened to all the parents?" She sounded so confused, so I told her, "It's only yours, kid, they left you on purpose." She cried. I felt bad for a second and thought, oh well, time to get back to my job at the orphanage.
When a Muslim dies, he gets 72 virgins.
It's the same thing with priests, except the virgins are children.
Once a man goes to a restaurant. Then, he was waiting until the waitress comes and tells him that they don't have food.
He was grumpy, but the waitress make him relaxing by unbuttoning her pants and undressing her panties and uncovering clothes from her pussy until everything get striped, then she say to him: "Good meal."
Daughter: So, I got my period.
Mom: That's wonderful, dear! Now you can bleed for a whole week a month without dying!
Daughter: That's nice, Mum, but isn't the whole point of getting your period dying?
Mom: Yes, but you have to kill yourself a little longer to live through to another day.
Daughter: Thanks, Mum. That makes a whole lot of sense. (Sarcastically.)
Mom: You're welcome, honey. (Clueless, obviously.)