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Every time a Light Saber goes off, it's just a Jedi Master getting hard over a kid. Lol.
What do you get when you mix alcohol with literature?
Tequila Mockingbird.
If your uncle Jack needed help getting off of a horse, would you help your uncle Jack off a horse?
Why don’t orphans live in villages?
Because they will get abandoned.
What do you call an Asian who gets a B?
It's not a B-sian.
Dead.
What kind of cold flu do the Japanese get? The Koflu.
When the class plays hangman, the emos get inspired!
My friend just told me about reverse exorcisms.
In these, the demon tells the priest to get out of the child.
Why don’t Asians get stung by bees?
Because they are always expected to get “A’s.”
Yo, barber fucked up so bad he had to get a breathalyzer test.
Papyrus: Sans, I have a joke. What do you call someone lazy and incompetent?
Sans: What do you call them?
Papyrus: YOU! NOW GET UP AND CLEAN YOUR ROOM, YOU LAZY BONES!
How do you get a baby out of a blender?
With Doritos!
What's the difference between me and an egg?
An egg gets laid.
If two vegetarians get into a fight, is it still called a beef?
Yes, you are the one who can get it, and what time do I have?
What do you get if you eat sugar?
High.
Why did the bee get into trouble?
Because he wasn't beehiving very well!
That one teacher that flips on and off the light switch to get the students' attention... that one kid with epilepsy...
Why do Russians drink grizzly bear piss?
Since vodka in Russia is so weak, Russians need a strong drink to get drunk.
What's the best part about duck tape?
It turns "No, no, no!" into "Mmmm, mmmmm, mmmmm!"
It makes it real easy to get to home base on that first date, too.