My wife told me to contact more of my feminine side.
I crashed the car and fucked my trainer.
My father told me to always carry a women's bag, but I don't know why he called the cops on me when I helped Mom's bag when we went parachuting. :(
The fact I couldn't hear the announcements at my school because the boys in my advisory are clapping with no hands should be a joke just in itself. They were making sexual faces as well, oh, and don't forget the moaning they do.
What do you think fish tasted like before women started swimming?
Jack and Jill went up a hill so Jack could eat her candy. But Jack got a shock and a mouth full of cock because Jill’s real name is Randy.
There used to be Wonder Woman.
Now we wonder, what is a woman?
God creates dog.
God: "You are man's best friend."
Dog: "That's pretty sexist."
God: "No, man as in- You know what, FUCK IT! You can't speak!"
Dog: "....."
God: "And chocolate kills you!"
Dog: "🐶"
A guy and girl had a sex poem competition.
Guy: "Two times two is four, four plus five is nine. I can put mine in yours, but you can't put yours in mine."
Girl: "Two times two is four, four plus five is nine. I know the length of yours, but you won't know the depth of mine."
What do you call a general neutral person who is lactose intolerant non-bi dairy
What's the difference between yo mama and German men?
The balls... German men don't have them.
Why can't a woman find a glory hole inside of the lady's room?
Because piss comes out of a woman's pussy.
Why do blonde prostitutes prefer blowjobs?
They hate it when you hand it to them.
Whats the difference btwn football and rape? Women don't like football.
Who gets more dick, straight male rap fans or straight male swifties? Answer: Straight male rap fans, because there’s no such thing as a straight male swiftie.
Boys are like minis.
Girls are like big pots.
Minis always come first. Don't think about sex boys, be men.
What is the difference between women and cars?
At least one of them retained their value after getting wrecked.
Why did God create women before men?
He didn’t want any advice on how to do it.
What's the difference between Ironman and Ironwoman?
One's a superhero, one's a command.
I would never slap a woman, then I’d be destroying property.
I have a lot of respect for trans women.
That surgery takes balls!
