Galaxy jokes
What do you call Darth Vader when he dies?
A black alien.
Why can't an orphan role-play Star Wars?
Because they have no one to play Darth Vader.
What's bigger than the Milky Way?
Michael Jackson's nose.
How do you organize a space themed birthday party?
You planet.
How does NASA organize a party? -- They planet.
Me and Who?
Ur mom is so fat that she has her own gravitational field. She attracts everything around her, from planets to asteroids to comets. She is the center of the solar system, and the sun is just one of her many satellites. She is so massive that she bends space and time, creating wormholes and black holes. She is the ultimate cosmic phenomenon, and no one can escape her pull.
Ur mom is so old that she witnessed the Big Bang. She was there when the universe was born, and she has seen it all. She knows the secrets of the cosmos, and she has lived through every epoch and era. She has watched stars form and die, galaxies collide and merge, and civilizations rise and fall. She is the oldest living being in existence, and she has more wisdom than anyone can imagine.
Ur mom is so ugly that she scares away aliens. She is the reason why we have never made contact with extraterrestrial life. They have seen her face and they have fled in terror. They have warned their fellow species to avoid Earth at all costs, because it is inhabited by a monstrous creature that defies all logic and beauty. She is the ultimate deterrent for invasion, and she has saved humanity from countless alien invasions.
What do you call expired milk?
The Milky Way.
Why did the astronauts take a box of cereal and a cow with them? In case they bypassed the Milky Way!
You're so fat, astronomers discovered a planet larger than Earth but smaller than Uranus.
Last night in bed, I was gazing up at the stars and was thinking to myself, "Where the f*ck is my roof?"
Why did the rapper go to space?
Because he wanted to drop some UNIVERSAL BARS!
What do you call a passport for Mandalorians?
A Pre Visa!
Stormtrooper: What should we do with this coffee?
Palpatine: Brew it!
If it is someone's birthday, say this for a joke:
"A long time ago in a far away galaxy...
YOU WERE BORN!"
Why couldn't the astronaut put the helmet on his head?
Because he didn't have enough space.
What is money called in space?
Star bucks.
Where did Milky Way get its degree?
At the university.
Yo mama so fat.
In Super Mario Galaxy, she was a fucking planet!
How do astronomers organize a party? They planet.
You're so fat when you step, you break the galaxy.