Where do cows stop to drink?
The Milky Way!
Stormtrooper: What should we do with this coffee?
Palpatine: Brew it!
Stormtrooper: What should we do about the failed plan?
Palpatine: Screw it.
Stormtrooper: Hey Palpatine! Luke is Vader's son.
Palpatine: Knew it.
At first I was skeptical, but the universe has really grown on me.
Did you hear about the restaurant on the moon? Great food, no atmosphere.
If it is someone's birthday, say this for a joke:
"A long time ago in a far away galaxy...
YOU WERE BORN!"
Sherlock Holmes and Dr. Watson decide to go on a camping trip. After dinner and a bottle of wine, they lay down for the night, and go to sleep.
Some hours later, Holmes awoke and nudged his faithful friend.
"Watson, look up at the sky and tell me what you see."
Watson replied, "I see millions of stars."
"What does that tell you?"
Watson pondered for a minute.
"Astronomically, it tells me that there are millions of galaxies and potentially billions of planets." "Astrologically, I observe that Saturn is in Leo." "Horologically, I deduce that the time is approximately a quarter past three." "Theologically, I can see that God is all powerful and that we are small and insignificant." "Meteorologically, I suspect that we will have a beautiful day tomorrow." "What does it tell you, Holmes?"
Holmes was silent for a minute, then spoke: "Watson, you idiot. Someone has stolen our tent!"
What do you call people who go to space? Icetronauts lolololol hahahahah.
What is a spaceman’s favorite chocolate?
A Mars bar!
You're so fat, astronomers discovered a planet larger than Earth but smaller than Uranus.
Can we have a party in space?
First, we need to planet ;)
Get it? "Plan it" = planet.
I am throwing a party in space. Can you help me planet?
Last night in bed, I was gazing up at the stars and was thinking to myself, "Where the f*ck is my roof?"
Why was the Milky Way remembered...
Because it's... DELICIOUS!
If I'm the night guard at the Samsung store, does that make me a guardian of the galaxy?
Where did Milky Way get its degree?
At the university.
How does NASA organize a party? -- They planet.
