Funny jokes
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What do Time Clocks like to play?
Tick Tack Toe.
Funny jokes are like kids with autism.
They have special needs to make them.
So, you're human, huh? Well, I'm a skeleton, so not much gets under my skin.
Touch your toes and hold them. Then spell "run." It will say, "r.u.n."
Q: Why are school shooting jokes funny?
A: Because they're intended for a young audience.
Hi, um okay... Knock! Knock! Who's there? Doris! Doris who? Doris look I need the key!
Um...oh here another one! Okay...so sorry I type random things on these joke sites...anyway...okay. What is a book never written: "Beautiful sites of the corel rife written by the ocean!"
When Ariana Grande walked into the church, she said, "GOD IS A WOMAN!"
What does a bullied kid say during a game of Kahoot?
"I'd like to Kahoot up this school."
Have any of you guys heard the classic airplane jokes? Here's a good example...
A farmer, a doctor, and a terrorist are on a plane. An engine fails, and they are going to crash, so the pilot asks everyone to throw out some items. The farmer threw out his apple harvest, the doctor threw out medical supplies, and the terrorist, (not needing a bomb apparently) threw out his briefcase of bombs. They still crashed, and they started walking to the nearest town. They passed a boy who was running. "Why are you running?"
"My dad got hit by a shiny red object and now he's bleeding!"
They three of them decide it's best to keep quiet, and continue. They then passed a crying girl, who said that her brother had been killed by a scalpel from heaven. They said nothing and continued. Finally, they see a boy laughing so much he is in tears. They ask him, "What's so funny?"
"Grandma farted and the house blew up!"
There was this kid who was going to take a girl to the dance. He had fancy clothes, fancy shoes, etc. Finally, the day of the dance came. He happily drove over to the girl's house. When he got there, he said to her father, "thank you for this moment, have a great night".
At the dance, the girl asks the boy, "can I have some food?" He gladly replies "yes" and walks over to the food trucks, only to see a huge line. So he waits in line for like 30 minutes. He comes back to the girl, and she says, "thank you so much, I really needed something to eat". Then she asks for some sweets and a soda. Again the boy waits in line for about 30-45 minutes. Then he comes back, and she says, "thank you SOOOO much". Then she says she has one more request. The boy, (now clearly agitated) says, "what is it?" She says, can I have some punch? SO the boy walks over to the punch table, but to his surprise, there was no punch line.
What does my family and the Twin Towers have in common? We both played Jenga.
I will make a funny joke if you let me be your boyfriend. I'm 19 and I am Russian.
This shit is disgusting but funny.
Rape jokes aren’t funny. People like me that are actually victims of rape are triggered by them.
I'd make a joke about the chin bones, but y'all couldn't mandle it.
When you were born, your mom said you were out of bounds, so you went flying out of the hospital.
Why aren't Down's syndrome jokes funny?
Because the format of them is ugly.
That was so funny, I forgot to laugh.
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