Funny jokes
"Knock, knock." "Who's there?"
"Cargo." "Cargo who?"
"Cargo beep, beep, beep, be-e-e-e-e-e-e-e-e-e-e-e-e-e-b!"
I usually tell jokes about Kobe, but they usually crash and burn.
Why did the carrot roll down the hill?
Because he couldn't stop his wheelchair.
Gwen?!?!??!/1??!?!??!
What is a necrophiliac's safe word?
"I'm alive!"
Funny Moments that happens:
Did you hear about the "Funny Doctor"?
He'll have you in "Stitches"!
What do you call a funny rapper?
A PUN-ISHER!
What's the difference between a girl and a toy? There is no difference because you play with both anyway.
What do you call an animal with 3 eyes, 2 mouths, 6 noses, and 4 ears?
Q: Ten shepherds out in the sheep field. How do you know which one's gay?
A: He's the one the sheep fuck!
(I'm gay, and I know this joke is demeaning and inappropriate, but I still think it's funny as a 2-inch penis.)
Monkey: What ya doing?
Other monkey: Just you know, "hanging around."
Bad joke, right? I just can't think of something amazing. It's like my brain is "hanging."
How do you find a blind man on a nude beach?
It’s not hard.
Yo mama is so fat, when she nocliped into the backrooms, she was in level 0 and level 999 at the same time.
Funny.
Q: Do you know why transgender people are good at being carpenters?
A: Because they have more experience cutting off their wood.
What do you call a girl skeleton dancing?
A bone-étit.
How many men does it take to open a bottle of beer?
A: None, it should be opened by the time she brings it.
Why couldn’t the bike stand up?
Because it was “two tired”!
Did you hear about the dyslexic wanna-be bank robber? He walked in and yelled, "HANDS UP, THIS IS A MOTHER STICKING F##K UP!" The lucky idiot got away because nobody could stop laughing!
Q: what happened when the depressed kid wanted to high five the tree?
A: It left him/her/them hanging.