I was riding ya mom... LIKE SHE’S MARIO KART!
I am an actual police officer (Not gonna mention with which department in case they actually check this site) and tbh I find these jokes funny as fuck, carry on boys.
I got so drunk with the guys yesterday that when the Uber driver asked how many drinks I had, I said, "Yes."
That was so funny i forgot to laugh
When you see someone with a double chin that’s sad:
Hey come on, man, keep your chin up. Wait, which one?
You think you're funny? Look at your hairline; it looks like a McDonald's sample.
So here’s this funny story, and it’s true.
So my mom has this friend. When this guy was a kid, he was on the school bus, and this Mexican kid checked him into the aisle, so he hits him across the face with a metal lunchbox, and he started bleeding. Then they both get banned from the bus for a few days, so him and his dad drive to the Mexican kids house, and his dad says to the Mexican kids dad “if your kid ever picks on my kid again, I’m gonna come back to this house and kick your ass!”
Your hairline is so bent, the McDonald's logo hairline made fun of it.
-E-
What do a stool and an emo have in common?
They both sit still.
My name is Ethan, and I don't find this funny.
Guys, can we change pride month to another month, please? My birthday is in June, and I'm not gay, and my friends keep making fun of me. I think we should change it to March because my brother's birthday is in March, and that'd be funny.
Abigail Brynn Welch is not funny.
Last week I felt so high and mighty I thought I could fly. I took one shot, puffed through my pipe, and jumped in the air on a trampoline. I woke up in heaven.
I asked an angel, "How did I die?"
"Well, little monkey, you thought your bed was a trampoline and you hit your head. Your mom called the doctor, and the doctor said you were dead."
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What’s the best form of contraception?
Being a soccer fan.
what's an orphan's favourite toy? boomerang because it come back
Whenever you're mad, just punch an orphan. What are they gonna do? Tell their parents?
What's the difference between Autism and Gender?
Autism is on a spectrum.
What does a perverted frog say?
"Rubbit."
hey baba girl I have balls you know