Friends jokes

Me: Bro, I don't think the Twin Towers will ever order pizza again.

Friend: Why?

Me: Because when they ordered pepperoni, all they got was plane.

What do you call a friend in space?

Space friend.

People call my blind friend dumb sometimes.

She can't see the obvious.

Jeffrey Dahmer and his mother are having dinner.

His mother says, “I don’t like your friends.”

Then Jeff says, “You can eat the potatoes.”

My disabled friend rolled into a burning orphanage and saved lots of kids. When he came out, the kids tried to play with him because his wheels were on fire. They called him Hot Wheels.

Nobody really liked our fireplace.

So I turned it into a brick pizza oven. Idk why, but now everyone likes our fireplace.

"Discuss the synopsis of this poem: My Friend Billy Has A Ten-Foot Willy."

My friends:

Maya: I only get 9 hours of sleep.

Josh: 9 hours? I get 7 hours of sleep.

Noah: You get 7? I get 4 hours of sleep.

Me: You guys are getting sleep...

Hey guys, how was your day?

If you ask me the same question, here's the answer: depressing.

I still haven't made any friends on this app. All I do is read and comment on old jokes or opinions.

My friend wasn't open to the idea of me becoming a nudist.

I told him to stop being so clothes-minded.

Here’s another joke my friend told me.

What did the school shooter do when the librarian told him to be quiet? Pulled out a silencer.

Yeah man! Life is wonderful! But, when you realize all of the ones you loved were fake.

And when you die, does your online friends notice? How will they notice? Or will they ever notice? Is 13 age too young for dying? Am I just paranoid? I'm scared.

"When your mom is pregnant and your best friend learns dad jokes."

Me:.....

Fat person: "Hey, what's up?"

Friend: "Your blood pressure!"

My Chinese friend died recently, So Yung.

I asked my friend what the best gay joke is, and she said "You."

My girlfriend just broke up with me because I held a door for another girl. She said I was cheating, but the girl I helped was in a wheelchair.

Why are friends good at dodgeball? Because no one misses them.

I got a new Lego airplane set from my friend... oddly, there were also two towers included in the box as well.

Me vs. the emo kid: we go to high-five a tree. I get a high five; the emo kid is left hanging.