Friends jokes

A friend called me a while back saying, "I have COVID.... I can't breathe, I really have a hard time breathing."

I reply saying, "Dude, you need to work on your George Floyd jokes."

A teenager went into a creepy house with his 3 friends. Only 2 came out. Where are the others?

(Getting brutally murdered.)

Here’s another joke my friend told me.

What did the school shooter do when the librarian told him to be quiet? Pulled out a silencer.

Hey guys, how was your day?

If you ask me the same question, here's the answer: depressing.

I still haven't made any friends on this app. All I do is read and comment on old jokes or opinions.

Two friends were walking in a forest. They started to fight.

A cannibal came and shouted, "Food fight!"

Yeah man! Life is wonderful! But, when you realize all of the ones you loved were fake.

And when you die, does your online friends notice? How will they notice? Or will they ever notice? Is 13 age too young for dying? Am I just paranoid? I'm scared.

My friend said they were going to make a comeback. I told them to do it at the back of the throat.

My friend showed me his broken finger, and I said, "JESUS!" He said his name is Jake.

What do you call a kid named Caitlyn?

My best friend.

A kid went and got a haircut. The day after, he went to school, and a friend says, "I like your cut." He replies, "Which one?"

Gather 6 friends to play Russian roulette, and one's mind will be blown away.

Why was the kinetic sand always happy?

Because it was kinetic with its friends!

Bro, I love hanging out with bullies. It's either we play Yahtzee or we playing Nazi.

I asked my friend how long I can be in the sky. He said if you are emo, then forever.

My disabled friend rolled into a burning orphanage and saved lots of kids. When he came out, the kids tried to play with him because his wheels were on fire. They called him Hot Wheels.

My mom: If your friend jumped off a bridge, would you?

Me: No.

Attack on Titan music starts playing in my head.

Me: Bro, I don't think the Twin Towers will ever order pizza again.

Friend: Why?

Me: Because when they ordered pepperoni, all they got was plane.

What do you call a friend in space?

Space friend.

I got a new Lego airplane set from my friend... oddly, there were also two towers included in the box as well.

Why are friends good at dodgeball? Because no one misses them.