Free Will jokes
Four men were asked if they could have something with their cousin for €500.
The first replied: "For 500€? Of course!"
The second said: "I'd do it for free!"
The third replied: "I would even give her 200€!"
The fourth replied: "With my ex? Never!"
What is the difference between Putin and Hitler? Putin no longer supplies gas and Hitler gives it away for free.
George Floyd: 3 years sober, drug and alcohol free.
My boss doctor said that we are getting a surgeon coming in tomorrow. I'm super excited to work with him. The next day, we had to do our first-ever open heart surgery, so me and the surgeon spent many hours on this patient. We finished the surgery and went outside for a smoke, and we were talking. I said, "Why did you keep the patient's blood on your glove?"
He replied, "We in my free time I test it for anything diseases, HIV." The next day, I got invited to his house, and we had some drinks. I said, "This is amazing red tea. What is in it?" Just the 2000 people you have cut open.
On a scale from 1 to America, how free are you this weekend?
Q: Why is Hitler better than Biden?
A: Because Hitler gave gas to his people for free.
What do you call a parent that is pregnant?
Buy one, get one free.
Yo mama is so stupid that she asked how much is a free sample.
Yo mama so dumb, she asked how much a free sample was.
Madeline McCann must have been homeless or something, she was sure eager for the free candy.
What does a roller coaster and Michael Jackson have in common?
Kids ride for free.
Imagine a white van. Now imagine a white guy in the driver seat with a sombrero on and his arm out the window, and on the side of the van it says "Free Candy." But there's blood all over the van and a dead clown in the back.
What do you call a pregnant slave?
Buy 1 get 1 free.
I made a deal with Satan. I would get a free pass to hell if I serve as a demon lord. So, see you guys at the end of times!
I lit a retirement home on fire so that all the seniors can be cremated for free.
Become an anti-furry for free KFC and dead orphans in your basement.
Her: "Land of the free".
Me: *fat*
Her: What do you mean?
Me: It's not fat-free.
What do you call a baby on the battlefield?
Free shield!
Nah! You're so poor, you can't afford free stuff!
One good thing about lynching during the holidays, free tree ornaments.