A man was forced off the Eiffel Tower, but he flew back up.
The executioners asked, "How'd you do that?"
He said, "I had magic chips. Here, take some."
They eat them, jump off, and die.
He asks for more chips, and the guy says, "You're a real a**hole when you're drunk, Superman!"
Broccoli is like anal sex.
If you're forced to have it as a child, you probably won't like it as an adult.
Is it just me, or are magnets really attractive?
Why was 6 afraid of 7?
Seven’s been worried about six even since he left Afghanistan. Every time 6 closes his eyes, he sees the war and hears the gunshots. He sees the blood, the killing, the death, and soldiers falling. When he looks at seven, he remembers when they were forced to eat their own flesh to not starve in those caves. He sees the war and the flashbacks will come back forever, burned into his soul and mind.
Q: What do Mexicans love to wear in the air force?
A: Air Force Juans.
Why don't Jedis make puns that often?
They usually have to force them. (I hate myself for that!)
What did Yoda say to Luke during his wedding ceremony?
"May divorce be with you."
What is your arm's favorite military branch? The army.
What's worse than a pile of dead babies?
One at the bottom that's still alive.
What's worse than that?
It's forced to eat its way out.
What's even worse than that?
It comes back for seconds.
What shoes do pedophiles wear? White vans.
How do pedophiles fit in? They force it to go in.
How do you make a 16 mm hole into a 40 mm hole? A pedophile comes in.
What did Santa say when he was passing over some hookers? "Ho ho ho!"
I dreamed I was forced to eat a giant marshmallow, but when I woke up, my pillow was gone!
What objects have the most gravitational force?
A Lambo and a gold digger.
Jim and Allyn are 2 mates in the Air Force. They were paired up for a training exercise. They got up into the air and Jim said, "Okay Allyn, your helmet can control the missile when launched from the jet. Go ahead and test fire a missile and aim it at anything you want." Allyn fired the missile and had his eyes set on an abandoned building. Jim then said, "I also forgot, watch out for friendly fire." Allyn said "What?" as he looked over at Jim.
Hey, I'm not forcing you to learn the Force.
Crucifixion - only one guy who nailed it... at least Jesus didn't get screwed over, but I bet he was pretty cross about being forced to hang around.
I know you don’t like rape jokes, but I’m gonna force one on you anyway.
What do you call a Jedi that can use the force to fly?
A Jedi Flight.
How is spinach like anal sex?
If you were forced to have it as a child, you probably won't like it as an adult.
What do you call a nervous Jedi?
Panakin.
