Food jokes
Why was the Pakistani bomber angry? Since he got a pepperoni instead of a plain [pizza].
Thomas Bulgin loves McDonald's dollars, A man of simple tastes, he hollers, With every visit, his heart does flutter, For golden arches, a fast food lover.
Those crispy fries, so perfectly fried, And burgers stacked, oh so high, The smell of grease, it fills the air, Thomas Bulgin, he'll always be there.
A dollar menu, his saving grace, A feast for him, a smile on his face, He counts his coins, with eager eyes, To savor each bite, a little prize.
In this world of fast-paced lives, Thomas Bulgin, he surely thrives, For in those golden arches, he finds, A moment of joy, that forever binds.
He cares not for gourmet cuisine, Nor fancy plates, fit for a queen, For in his heart, a simple truth, McDonald's dollars, his fountain of youth.
So let him eat, and let him feast, Thomas Bulgin, the fast food beast, For in those golden arches, he's found, A taste of happiness, unbound.
Having cockroaches in the house is a sign that you've food.
These things are like Ugandan girls, they hate poverty.
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Yull.
Yull who?
You'll be sorry if you eat all the fruitcake!
What's the difference between an apple and an orphan?
Apples get picked.
What do you call a cow with three legs?
Tri-tip!
What's the difference between an orphan and an apple?
Apples get picked.
What's an egg's favorite phrase?
An eggspression.
What does Bill Cosby and someone eating at McDonald's have in common?
They're both mc lovin' what they're eating.
What did Mrs. Hotdog join after Mr. Hotdog joined LGBBQ+? The LGBBQ++ premium.
Your mum eats cabbage.
What came first, the chicken or the egg?
I do not know.
You're so poor, you like postcards for food.
Why is it good to be an orphan?
Because every bag of chips is family sized.
What do you call Autistic kids baking?
"Downies" with brownies.
Can I ask you a question? Nut now!
What is the biggest candy in the world?
Candy Borobudur.
What flowers do orphans use?...
Self-raising flour.
I was in the mood for some dark meat, so I called my black friend.
Friend A: Do you like Wendy's?
Friend B: Yes, why?
Friend A: Wen-dez nuts in your mouth!