Food jokes
What is the difference between an egg and you? An egg gets laid, and you don't.
What's the name of a cannibal's favorite all-you-can-eat buffet? Planned Parenthood!
What did the corn say to the flying apple?
"That's corny."
Why do orphans eat cereal with water? Because their dad never came back with the milk.
"Knock knock."
"Who's there?"
"Bagel."
"Bagel who?"
"Toast, it's me, your arch-nemesis, Bagel, here to make up! Bye!"
What 3 words started Jeffery Dahmer's cannibalism?
This isn't ketchup.
What’s the best way to get a baby out of a blender? Tortilla Chips.
What’s the hardest part of a vegetable? The wheelchair.
What does a bullet and milk have in common? They both take out your dad.
What do oranges sweat?
Orange juice. 😂🍊❤️
I eat kids.
Why did the astronauts take a box of cereal and a cow with them? In case they bypassed the Milky Way!
Bully: You're so short you hand-glide on a chip.
Short person: Well, at least I don’t look like a giraffe that just came out of an oven!
Why couldn't the teddy bear finish his dessert?
He was stuffed.
What’s a cannibal's favorite takeaway shop?
The orphanage.
I like pie.
Why does Royal Cola have more royalty than a queen?
Answer: It tastes better.
What do you get when Cayden steals your sandwich? A knuckle sandwich.
What's up with airline food?
What do you get when you throw a pile of dead babies into a fryer?
Kentucky Fried Children!
What's it called when you eat those same babies?
Finger Lickin' Good!