Food jokes
Yo mama so stupid.
When she was in mandarin class, she asked, "Where are the mandarins? I'm hungry."
A person laughs every day.
"Man," they say, "I'm glad I'm not an egg, otherwise I'd just CRACK MYseLf uP!"
A brain eats cheddar cheese.
What did the dumb kid call ratios?
A type of cereal.
What do you call a sexually attracted pizza who spoons another pizza?
A Topping.
Q: What happens when a pig plays tug-of-war?
A: Pulled pork.
A no legged manager runs the nearest pizza place called Your Pizza Is A Joke.
I (J0K35) worked there and this happened...
Manager: WHY ARE THE PINEAPPLES IN THE TRASH?
Me: Because nobody eats fucking pineapple pizza.
Manager: THAT'S IT! I'M KICKING YOU OUT OF THIS PLACE!
Me: You can't kick me out.
Manager: Why not? Huh?
Me: Because you need legs to kick, and you don't have any.
J0K35 (me): So I heard China recently released a snack.
Guy: Oh, what is it?
J0K35: They call it the Asian Raisin.
Guy: Isn't that what RiceGum was when he released Frick da police?
What is a rat's favorite dessert?
A chocolate mousse cake.
Poop + mouth = yummy for dung Beatles and HEDGEHOGS!
I heard a joke about chocolate.
It wasn’t that funny.
I just Snicker-ed.
The most unrealistic part of Chotta Bheem is not him eating a laddu and getting power. It's him eating a whole laddu in one shot.
What does iCloud eat for lunch?
Your documents.
You couldn't spit out a good sentence, even if you ate a bowl of alphabet soup.
What does a serial killer make for breakfast?
Scrambled legs and toes.
What do you call butter without an expiration date?
A miracle butter, because wow!
What did the expired butter do once it had expired?
It did an expire.
What's great about an emo pizza?
It cuts itself. Yay!
My sis said only garlic and onions can make you cry.
So I threw an orange at her.
Why does Mario eat mushrooms?
Because he's a very fungi!