Food jokes
What did Ronnie have at Taco Bell?
A mind-blowing bean burrito.
My dad had a very unfortunate accident with his death. I clearly asked for Jammy Dodgers and got Bourbons!
Your mom is so skinny, she eats Skinny Pop!
Little boy: Momma?
Mom: Yes, my dear.
Little boy: One day I wanna work in McDonald's.
Mom: Why!?
Little boy: Just to see if their ice cream machine is actually broken.
How do you get 50 hungry kids into a box? You put a can of beans in there.
How do you get 50 hungry kids out of a box? You run past with a can opener.
Juice WRLD farts smell like McDonalds.
How does a cannibal like his meat?
Human.
Why shouldn't you let a Chinese person play baseball?
'Cause they'll eat the bat!
What is the difference between an orphan and an apple?
Apples get picked.
I have no problem getting dates online. I’ve also had luck with almonds, cashews, and walnuts.
A pecan is motivated because pe-can do anything.
Pistachio can’t, but pe-can.
You pecan do it!
You must be rich! You've got all the cashews.
Cashew, see, I'm nuts about you!?
I love almond milk. It’s unlike any udder milk.
I’d tell you a secret about peanut butter, but you might spread it.
I want an almond-flavored biscuit. Amaretti? You bet I am!
I want an almond-flavored biscuit.
The peanut gained confidence and finally came out of its shell.