Fired jokes

What happened when the fire used Tinder?

He luckily got a lot of matches.

Apex Legends: exists.

Titanfall fandom: (Literally on fire and at war with itself) "Everything is fine."

"Dick, you're fired."

"I'd buy that for a dollar."

What do you call an orphan in a wheelchair running into fire? Hot Wheels.

Why did so many people die in the Grenfell Fire Disaster in London?

All the exit signs were in English.

What do all rangas have in common?

They all look like wildfires.

Why did the bullet end up losing his job?

Because he got fired!

What gets bigger when it eats but dies when it drinks?

Answer: fire.

LEGO Ninjago - I like it, okay?

Which of the ninja would be best for an undercover mission as the person in disguise?

Kai. He just has to leave his hair down and no one would know it was him. He uses hair gel, as Cole has said a couple times I think, because his hair looks like fire 🔥!

A chemical store burned down, and the firefighter just stood there, but at the end, the store fire just went out by itself. But the store owner still got angry.

Store owner: Why didn't you take out the fire?

Firefighter: Yeah, but it went out by itself.

Store owner: But still, why?

Firefighter: Your chemical store sells H20.

Store owner: Oh, I get it now!

Three cowboys are at a fire talking about the best things they have done.

Cowboy 1 says, "I have taken out a whole group of raiders with my bare hands."

Cowboy 2 says, "I have killed a herd of bulls with my thumb."

Cowboy 3 chuckles as he mixes the fire with his dick.

If possible, I refrain from brunching celebrities. My path is smooth. The table receives the branching.

When I arrived at my friend's house and, after a long time, I was given permission to pick from the branches and graze the dog, I agreed. Then the work begins. "No, no money," I replied, "that's why I'm a burden to the world that hurts me."

And when I told them, they told me and said they were there. If I had a job, I would be fired on the first day for bad behavior. The best solution is to avoid this situation.

I got fired from the library in the first 30 minutes because I "womens rights" in the sci-fi fiction section.

What begins in F and ends in UCK?

Fire truck.

How do you make a cat sound like a dog?

You set it on fire; then it goes, "WOOF!"

What do you call Stephen Hawking on fire?

Hot Wheels.

I was camping with my buddy, and there was a fire. We were roasting marshmallows, and there was a vine. I tripped on it and went penis first into the fire, and I said, "Well, there goes your children, stupid ass!"

How do you get 500 drunk TTC people out? "Ah, on fire, a warning shot." "Uhhh sir, it's a M92 mortar." "Ah, just fire the shot!" Please get out before you get triggered from the pool and you have no clothes showing your nono parts. Oh wait, please get out of the pool drunk people. Potato, potatoes, fire ze shot.

Random person: Minecraft is actually more peaceful than real life.

Me: Well, screw life. Maybe if I light a fire on myself, I will go to Minecraft (my excuse for suicide).

Did you hear about the fire at the shoe factory?

Unfortunately, many soles were lost.