Fired jokes
When you name yourself Twin Towers and Terrorist in Kahoot:
"Twin Towers" is on fire🔥
"Terrorist" is on a streak of 2.
Falco: Dreaming of a day when I don’t hear people say I’m a knockoff Fox, knockoff Fox.
Fox: Dreaming of a day when you die in a fire and I get all your aerial skills.
Falco: Wat...
What’s black and at the top of a stair case?
Stephen Hawking during a house fire.
What do you call Stephen Hawking on fire? Hot wheels.
Build your ex a fire, and they're warm for a day.
Set your ex on fire and hide the smile/evidence.
A repost to celebrate: Happy Mario Day! Take a break and read your favorite chapter from the Communist Manifesto.
Why did so many people die in the Grenfell Fire Disaster in London?
All the exit signs were in English.
A man said his bars are lit. I said no, because mine are fire.
How did the bullet lose its job? It got fired!
I got fired from the bowling ball factory for throwing out the ones that had holes in them.
What do all rangas have in common?
They all look like wildfires.
Why did the bullet end up losing his job?
Because he got fired!
What do you call a gay kid on fire? LGBBQ.
Why can you rub a dog's nose in their pee when they go on the carpet but when I do the same to an Alzheimer's patient I get fired from the nursing home?
Why can’t anyone sing “hit me with your best shot” at the veterans ball karaoke?
Because every time she sang the line “fire away,” someone started shooting!
What's Stephen Hawking called on fire?
Hot Wheels :)
This guy comes knocking on the door in hell and speaks to God. "Please let me out, it is too cold in here!"
God is all confused. "There is a big fire in there!" The guy answers, "Yes, there is, but you cannot get near it. All the bishops, cardinals, and priests are sitting around it."
What does a cute deaf girl and a fire have in common?
They're both hot, but they're both quiet.
Why did the rapper wear sunglasses to the concert?
Because his lyrics were so fire, he needed protection!
What happened when the fire used Tinder?
He luckily got a lot of matches.
I'm running out of degrees? I guess I better throw myself in fire to raise my internal temperature (measured in degrees).