Fire jokes
I set a gay person on fire. We now call him LGBBQ.
My friend: I want to cut myself.
Me: No, don’t do that. *hands lighter* Do this instead.
This guy comes knocking on the door in hell and speaks to God. "Please let me out, it is too cold in here!"
God is all confused. "There is a big fire in there!" The guy answers, "Yes, there is, but you cannot get near it. All the bishops, cardinals, and priests are sitting around it."
What do all rangas have in common?
They all look like wildfires.
I got fired from the bowling ball factory for throwing out the ones that had holes in them.
Why did the man get fired from the calendar factory?
He only took a day off.
What gets bigger when it eats but dies when it drinks?
Answer: fire.
Below I meant to say I set the gay person on fire.
What happened when the fire used Tinder?
He luckily got a lot of matches.
What do you get when you light Stephen Hawking on fire? A fried PC.
Apex Legends: exists.
Titanfall fandom: (Literally on fire and at war with itself) "Everything is fine."
How do rappers stay warm in the winter?
With their FIRE LYRICS!
LEGO Ninjago - I like it, okay?
Which of the ninja would be best for an undercover mission as the person in disguise?
Kai. He just has to leave his hair down and no one would know it was him. He uses hair gel, as Cole has said a couple times I think, because his hair looks like fire 🔥!
A chemical store burned down, and the firefighter just stood there, but at the end, the store fire just went out by itself. But the store owner still got angry.
Store owner: Why didn't you take out the fire?
Firefighter: Yeah, but it went out by itself.
Store owner: But still, why?
Firefighter: Your chemical store sells H20.
Store owner: Oh, I get it now!
I got fired from the library in the first 30 minutes because I "womens rights" in the sci-fi fiction section.
A Catholic school is burning down. One of the priests says, "Save the children, save them!" Another priest says, "F*ck the children, we're gonna die!!" The last priest is like, "Hmmm... do we have time?"
"I put the tin foil in the microwave, ma!"
Breaking News! A plane crashes into a bridge.
What do you call Stephen Hawking on fire?
Hot Wheels.
How do you get 500 drunk TTC people out? "Ah, on fire, a warning shot." "Uhhh sir, it's a M92 mortar." "Ah, just fire the shot!" Please get out before you get triggered from the pool and you have no clothes showing your nono parts. Oh wait, please get out of the pool drunk people. Potato, potatoes, fire ze shot.