Fight jokes
What do 9-11 and a fighter have in common? They both have a one-two combo.
I can explain Superman and Batman movies in one sentence.
Two orphans fighting in the rain.
They say that the tongue is the strongest muscle in the human body. Wanna fight? 👅💦
What are some other names for rape? There’s the classic “struggle snuggle,” but then there’s my personal favorite “fuck fight”.
What war did Africa not win? The water fight.
I once fought with a man in a wheelchair.
He couldn't stand a chance.
North Korea and the Martians were fighting about who was going to reach Venus first.
Trump steps in and says, "That doesn't matter, America is going to land on the sun first."
The Martians and North Korea said, "You can't land on the sun, it's too hot and you will die."
Trump said his brilliant plan, "America is going to land there at night."
If a woman gets raped, just walk away, don't bother. Cheer on the rapist if you want.
They believe they are equal to men, right? So they are able to fight back, right? Then prove it! My EQUALITY!
I saw this really old guy with the Hitler stache, so I decided to start beating him up.
It was very weird when a camera crew came out with Harrison Ford and started yelling at me.
Did you know that former Australian Prime Minister Scott Morrison was a firefighter? He got fired for trying to fight a fire with tickets to Hawaii.
I hate it when a couple has a minor quarrel, and the girlfriend updates her Facebook status to ‘single.’
I mean, I fight with my parents all the time, but I never update my status to ‘orphan.’
How was copper wire invented?
Two Jewish people fighting over a penny.
Where does the Batman go to pee?
The Batroom.
A brunette fought and didn't get raped.
A blonde thought and did get raped.
If an emo kid and the quiet kid had a fight, the quiet kid would win because the emo kid would cut himself to death.
Two friends were walking in a forest. They started to fight.
A cannibal came and shouted, "Food fight!"
Draco Malfoy had a wand fight in the bathroom.
Two kids were beating up a ginger kid in an ally, so I stepped into help. He didn’t stand a chance against the three of us.
A police officer came up to me and said, "Just why, why would you bring the epileptic children to a laser tag fight?"
So, some ants in a colony go to war. They want some more troops and know that there are ants that went to wars as well. They call them war-ants.
They start barging into homes to search for more war-ants. They barge into a home, and the lady-ant goes, "Hey, why are you here? Can you please leave?" One of the ants replies with, "I'm sorry, but unless you have a war-ant, we have to keep searching your house."