Casualty

Casualty Jokes

Suicide

Friend: *hits head* Others: How many fingers am I holding up? Me to friend: How suicidal am I on a scale from one to ten? Friend: Ten Me: He's fine guys.

Missile

A missile hit a hospital earlier this morning. Fortunately, no one was injured - but 100 were killed.

ID

When David lost his ID, I called him Dave. Where did Dave go during the bombing? Everywhere. Guess who came crawling back?

Shooting

Man 1: Hey, I heard you survived a school shooting. What was it like?

Man 2: People were screaming and running everywhere. I was only able to get a few of them.

Unit

"Our all-transgender brigade has suffered heavy casualties!"

"What? We haven’t even sent them to fight!"

"They’ve already lost 30% of the unit!"

Victim

Who are the fastest readers in history?

9/11 victims. They went through 80 stories in 10 seconds.

Fire

There was a fire at my high school when I was in Year 7.

When the local newspaper interviewed my teacher, they asked her how she was seeing the "bright side" of it.

She said, "Well, at least our new students got a warm welcome!"

54 students died that day.

Similarity

What's a similarity between Harvey Weinstein's pants and American bombs?

They both drop unannounced and leave mass casualties.

Grandpa

My grandpa's last words before he died in Vietnam were, "What the fuck did I step on?"

People

Why were the people in the Twin Towers upset? They ordered pepperoni pizza, but instead they got plane.

War

*World War 2 going on and then stops.*

Me: "I guess you would say it was a gory-ious battle."

Victim

Who are the fastest readers in the world?

The 9/11 victims, they went through 700 stories in 10 seconds.

Foot

What has 5 legs, 3 arms, and 7 feet?

The finish line at the marathon bombing.