Fiction jokes
Why did Alice from Wonderland get her butt stuck in the rabbit hole at first? Because she probably ate too many hamburgers and drank too much wine just out of nowhere, then told her butt to hold it in before more food pops out.
A boy went to a genie and said, "I want to be like Batman."
He went home, his parents weren't there.
What has a kid with cancer and Peter Pan in common?
They will never grow up.
What is an orphan's most relatable movie? Spiderman: No Way Home.
How did Harry Potter get down the hill?
Running, JK rolling!
"I think Hannibal Lecter is soooo sexy... I'd like him to eat me!"
The last joke about the dad was a joke. Don't take it seriously. Can't believe that people actually think that was true.
Damn, didn't know this site was about Harry Pot-
Superman and Flash were in the living room pounding back a few beers. Flash says to Superman, "I bet you can fly into Wonder Woman's bedroom and get the best pussy of your life." So he does it. When he goes back to Flash, Superman says, "Man, that was great, but my ass kinda burns."
What do you call a zombie?
Nothing because zombies aren’t real, and if they were, you would be dead.
What did the skeleton say to Shrek?
"Jump on me. I can have two layers of skin too."
Why does the Jedi never join the dark side?
If they did, then they would lose the opportunity to molest young padawans.
She a hoe, she shit on herself.
I was Gandalf the Grey.
But now, after just three washes...
All Mia needs to destroy the evil young girl in Resident Evil 7 Biohazard, was using a pedophile instead of serum.
Snow White and the six Dwarfs, Sneezy was caught by covid-19 quarantine!
Yo momma's so ugly Thanos had to snap twice.
What do you call someone who wants to jump off a building?
Cause they want to become Super Man.
Superman was bored and wanted to go out. He called all his super friends, but they were all busy. He even calls Louis, but it's her time of the month.
He flies to the liquor store and buys some beer and gets drunk. As he is flying, he sees Wonder Woman naked on top of the roof. He starts thinking, "I will fly down and have sex with her sooooo fast," BURP, "that she won't know what happened," HICKUP.
He flies to her faster than the speed of light, BANG BANG BANG BANG BANG BANG BANG, and flies away with a smile. He passes out and crashed into a wall.
Wonder Woman jumps up and screams, "WHAT WAS THAT?"
The Invisible Man appears, holding his butt, and he gets off on Wonder Woman and says, "I don't know, but my butt hurts real bad."
I was reading a book about an immortal dog yesterday...
It was impossible to put down.