New Fiction Jokes

I was reading a great book about an immortal cat the other day. It was impossible to put it down.

What if Game of Thrones and Harry Potter antagonism had a child?

Coldemort!

A buddy and I checked out some books from a local library, when we returned them he said “your sister works the returns right” I told him “yes she does and she will be here in about five minutes”. He said “ why don’t we put a cook book in the women’s sports section” I told him “I love it” so I picked out a Reese Witherspoon book.

I don’t get why Katniss was bitching so much in ‘The Hunger Games’ books. Ethiopia has been competing for years and I don’t hear any of them complaining.

What do trans men and Pinocchio have in common?

Both are lying when they say, "I'm a real boy."

Rape, 9/11, abortion, orphan, murder, dead, kill, drugs.

What makes all these categories so familiar? Either you've experienced them, or made them up in your backstory.

Chuck Norris heard that nothing in the world could kill him.

So he tracked down nothing in the world and killed it.

What show do orphans relate to? I'm going with "The Hunger Games."

What do you call a sneaky SCP-096?

The Spy Guy!

I got a job at a library,i got fired after 15 minutes,they told me it was because I put women's right in fiction section

What's the difference between Harry Potter and Anne Frank?

Harry made it out of the chamber.

Your hairline sucks; even Harry Potter could not put it under a spell to turn it back to order.

I heard that the World Orphan Organization has a sponsor... DC Comics.

Got a job at the library yesterday... It lasted fifteen minutes... Turns out books about women's rights don't belong in the fiction section.

What do you call a gang of emo kids?

Suicide Squad.

There never was a historical Jesus Christ. Hey, do not even dream of crucifying me.

I got kicked out of Social Studies class when my teacher made us watch a women's rights documentary. When he asked us what the genre of the film was, I put my hand up and said "Fiction."