Sister: your adopted
Me: at least they wanted me, they must feel terribly bad cuz they had to keep you :(
Today I feel diving. Today I feel penalty. Today I feel tap in. Today I feel ghosting. Today I feel finished. Today I feel a bench warmer... I know what it feels to be discriminated... I was bullied because I am Pristiano Penaldo
This joke includes potentially sensitive content.
This joke includes potentially sensitive content.
This joke includes potentially sensitive content.
My friend: you ever feel like life is pointless *drives faster* Me: yea- My friend: if you could die with one person who would it be? *speeds up more* Me: H-hey you should slow down! slow down slow down! were about to-
How did Santa feel when he got stuck in the chimney?
Claus-trophobic
I took my 5 year old son to ride some roller coasters, I think he didnβt like it, because I challenged him to a no hands contest. He said but I donβt have any. He wanted to know what dark humor is. Now he knows what it is and what it feels like.
Cristiano Clapnaldo woke up FEELING DANGEROUS against Real Sociedad π₯Άπ₯Ά
- 0 tapins ππ - 0 assists π€©π€© - 3/3 dives π€―π€― - 0 key passes π₯΅π₯΅ - 2 big chances missed π€‘π€‘ - 1/4 dribbles ππ - 2 Offsides π€π€ - 27 claps ππ
Better than Elanga? π₯Άπ₯Ά
The depressed kid walked into the counselor's office. "I'm feeling like killing myself," he said. "Oh no! Don't worry, sweetie, just hang in there!," the counselor responded.
Q. why did the orphan rob a bank
A. to feel wanted for the first fucking time
This joke includes potentially sensitive content.
Why did the chicken cross the road?
He was just feeling like he needed a break, you know? Life is hard when you're a rooster looking after your hen and chicks. He just wanted a sense of normality, walking out of the farm. He felt light-headed, staring into the distance. Then, at this very moment, he realised it was his darkest hour.
Join us for more of the story, after the break!
This joke includes potentially sensitive content.
A man and a boy are walking into a forest. It begins to get dark. The boy says "Mister, I'm scared." The man replies "How do you think I feel, I have to walk back alone."
Why did Michael Jackson go to jail? He was feeling a little Randy
Q: Have you ever felt a window? A: Did you feel the pane?
What's the difference between what Bill Cosby did and what OJ Simpson did? OJ Simpson's victims actually suffered and I actually feel bad for them (the boyfriend at least)
A man sees a crying woman by a pond. She is in a wheelchair and has no arms or legs. He asks her why she is crying and she answers that she has never been hugged. Feeling pity, he hugs her then jogs away.
The next day he finds her crying again and she says she has never been kissed. The man kisses her and jogs away again.
On the third day the man sees her crying and asks her thrice. She tells him she has never been fucked. The man picks her up...and throws her in the pond telling her, "You're fucked now!"
1 just feeling sad 2 depression 3 self harm 4 suicide
