Family jokes
What does the F in orphan stand for?
FAMILY 😭😭
*IT'S DEPRESSING THIS PAGE EXISTS*
Son: Daddy, what's dark humor?
Dad: See that man over there with no arms or legs? Go tell him to stand up and clap.
Son: But Daddy, I'm blind.
Dad: Exactly.
Why can't orphans be gay?
'Cause they have no one to call "daddy."
Orphan jokes aren't to be made fun of.
They're just aimed at older audiences. Oh wait.
THEY AREN'T EVEN OLDER AGES.
Why does an orphan love baseball? Because their ball comes back, get pranked, bitch!
What did Little Johnny say to his dad?
Johnny: "Dad, please not again! I'm too young!"
A girl asked her mom, "Why is my name Walmart?"
Her dad replied and said, "Because that’s where you were made."
A kid was asking a mother for money.
Mother: Sorry, I don't have money.
The kid kept asking the mother for money.
Mother: I already told you I don't have money.
The kid (the middle child): I'm your fucking child!
Orphans can't find the home page.
What does an orphan not have in common with a criminal?
Criminals are wanted.
What do orphans go to church for?
So they can call someone "father."
What did Sophie Brussaux's baby get every week?
A face full of sperm.
Your hairline is so repulsive that my entire family got eye cancer from seeing it, and it goes so far back that you be looking like Vegeta.
What's the difference between an orphan and an apple tree? The apples get picked.
A virgin is what I called my daughter before I took that away from her.
"9/11 was not funny; it was plane wrong because my dad was the best fucking pilot in Jeddah."
What's the best part of being an orphan?
All the chips and candy bars are family sized.
Is your dad a magician?
Because he magically disappeared.
Fuck, my dad has cancer, lol.
I would create an orphan website, but you need a homepage to do that.