Girl: I've been a orphan since I was three.
Boy: knock knock.
Girl: ..Who's there?
Boy: not your parents!
Kid:what is between moms legs? Dad:paridise. Kid whats between you legs? Dad:the key to paridise. Kid:well uou better change the lock the neighbor has the key to.
*Im an orphan. lol
My mom always said garlic powder makes everything better so i sprinkled some on my divorce papers and my wifes broken leg.
A husband and a wife have four children the oldest three are tall with blonde hair, the youngest is short with brown hair. The husband was on his deathbed and said “honey, can you be completely honest with me, is our youngest son mine?” The wife says “I swear to all that is holy he is your son.” Then the husband died and the wife muttered, “thank god he didn’t ask about the other three.”
Why are orphans so good at tennis?
Because that’s the only love they get
What is it called when an orphan takes a selfi? A family photo
When I was a child, my parents told me my uncle was ‘sleeping with the fishes’. At first, I thought he bought a water bed, but I then discovered he was killed and buried at sea.
i feel sad for orphans the cant watch star wars bc its parental guidance
Depression hits harder than my dad
Me-are you an orphan? Boy-yeah, what gave me away? Me-....ur parents
My dad is like my virginity. I lost him at 12
At my funeral, take the bouquet off the coffin and throw it into the crowd to see who's next
I have the heart of my mom, the face of my dad, the eyes of my grandpa, the ears of my grandma, and the hair of my uncle. We don't look anything alike I just collect body parts
Being an orphan isn't all bad on the bright side all your snacks are family sized
Note to self.
When baking for the holidays don't Google creampies.
Google cream pie recipes.
Money and my mom are kinda the same thing they come and leave easlily
What is the similarities of an orphan and a newborn plant, Both their parents were seperated.
SON: “Mommy, I found Daddy!” MOM: “What did I tell you about digging in the garden?”
A Man walks into a bar and Orders 3 shots of Whisky, The Bartender asks "What's got you down" The man says "I just found out my Niece is gay." The next day he orders 4 shots of Whisky The Bartender asks "What's got you down now?" The man says "I just found out my son is gay." The next day he orders 6 shots of whisky The Bartender says "Got anybody who likes Women?" The man says "My wife does."
