Family

Family jokes

Little Johnny

    • Little Johnny was playing with his train and said, "All you motherf*ckers who want to get off, get off, and all you motherf*ckers who want to get on, get on." His mother hears him and asks, "Is that you cussing?" The mother said, "Go to your room for 1 hour." Little Johnny goes to his room, then comes back one hour later and said, "All you motherf*ckers who wanna get off, get off, and all you motherf*ckers who wanna get on, get on, and if you wanna know about the 1 hour delay, go ask the b*tch in the kitchen."

  • 10

    • Man

    • A man boards a plane with six children of various ages.

    After the plane takes off, a woman sitting behind the man asks him, “Are all of them yours?”

    “No,” the man responds. “I work for a condom company and these are some of the customer complaints.”

  • 2
    • Family memes

    Gay

    • "What does the word 'gay' mean?" asked a son of his father.

    "It means 'happy'," replied the father.

    "Oh," contested the son, "so you are gay then?"

    "No, son, I have a wife."

  • 19

    • GPS

    • Woman one: "I got so mad at my GPS today that I told it to go to hell!"

    Woman two: "Did that work?"

    Woman one: "Well, it took me to my in-laws’ house."

  • 0

    • Viagra

    • A child has diarrhea and asked his mom for a Viagra. "Why in the world do you want that?" she asked him. He looks at her and says, "Well, that's what you gift dad when his shit won't get hard."

  • 7

    • Child

    • As a child, my mother always told me she was going horse riding. My whole life changed when I found out she was under the horse.

  • 4