Family jokes
Alcoholics don't run in my family, they drive.
Why do orphans suck at web design?
They don’t know what a home page is.
When you see an orphanage bully, remind them that no matter how powerful they are, they will never be as strong as their dads... Oh wait, they don't have a dad.
Why did the orphan sit alone in the corner?
They wanted some family time.
Why do orphans go to church?
Not because they are religious, because they want someone to call father.
Memes
What do you call a guy in a wheelchair that lives with the royal family?
Rolls Royce.
Yo mama is so ugly that when Santa came to the house and saw a picture of her, he died.
Why do orphans like boomerangs?
They actually come back.
Teacher: I was an orphan as a kid.
Students: Damn!
Teacher: Is anyone missing?
Students: Your parents!
What's worse than a dead baby?
A pile of dead babies.
What's worse than that?
One's alive at the bottom.
What's even worse than THAT?
It eats it's way out.
Wait it gets worse...
It goes back for seconds.
Just one more I swear...
It fucks one of it's siblings at the bottom.
An orphan once said, "I will call my mum and go home."
A homeless kid once said he will go home.
What do you call a dude that is always high and gets higher than everyone else in the family? The alpha pothead!
You know, the strangest things happen. My mom said, "Step on a crack, you break your mama's back, but if you step on a line, you break your father's spine." I stepped on the line. It didn't break his spine. Mom, who is my father?
You know why Santa's saying is "Ho Ho Ho?"
How else is he supposed to give boys and girls a baby brother or sister for Christmas?
Me: Why can't orphans play baseball? Friend: Why? Me: Because they can't find home.
Suicide really isn't something to joke about, unless it's hanging yourself.
It's a really quicker way to die, and less blood spilled for your mother to clean up.
Grandma: You guy's generation is on too much technology.
Kid: Well, you're the ones that raised us.
Other family members: ...
Imagine orphans watching Spiderman: No Way Home.
Why can the orphan only buy 1 ice cream cone?
He can't afford a family pack.
What is the difference between apples and orphans?........... The apple gets picked.