Family jokes
What's the difference between cotton and an orphan?
One gets picked.
My brother apparently has this thing called "asthma". Anyway, I took his vape away today, and he was lying on the floor gasping for air, lol. He must really be addicted to it.
What's an orphan's least favorite movie? Spiderman: No Way Home.
Why are orphans bad at basketball?
They haven't learned how to keep the ball with them.
If you’re bored, go punch an orphan. What are the parents gonna do?
What is an orphan's most hated baseball team? The Padres.
My late grandpa was always popular with women. One day, before he died, I asked him what his secret was. He said, "I inherited a watering hole."
Bewildered, I replied, "What does that have to do with anything?"
"I could easily get anyone wet because I was well endowed."
My great-great-great grandpa killed Hitler.
Why are orphans so bad at dodgeball?
Because nobody misses them.
I learned my dad got into a car crash this morning.
And my driver's license got revoked too.
I went on an orphan website. Sadly, there was no home page.
Orphans are the best people to bully. They have no parents.
Don’t orphans work at Dollar Tree?
Cause it’s a family business.
I don't know an orphan joke, but I bib cried last night.
Because I am an orphan.
Is it possible for an orphan to go on an away trip?
No, because they already are on one.
The teacher called Little Johnny to her desk. She said: “This essay you’ve written about your pet dog is exactly the same essay your brother has written.”
“Of course it is,” said Johnny. “It’s the same dog.”
Why can’t orphans play baseball?
Because they don’t know where home is.
Why can't orphans ride a bike?
'Cause their parents won't follow them.
What is old, cold, and alone?
An orphan's parents.
What sexual position produces the ugliest kids? Ask your mum!