Family jokes

How do parents punish their blind kid? They move the bed.

Yo dad's so stupid, he came back after he got the milk.

My wife and I just decided we don't want to have children.

So if anyone wants them, our contact information is below.

How do you get an orphan to go to sleep?

Tell them their parents are waiting when they wake up.

Why do orphans play GTA so much?

Because they can be wanted for once.

Why can't orphans play baseball? They can't find a home.

Mommy, when will daddy come back?

I'm not your mom...

Why can’t orphans be gay?

Because they have no one to call daddy.

I saw a kid on the curb while I was on a walk, and he was in baggy clothes, and I said, "Are you an orphan?" He said, "Yeah." And the orphan said, "What gave me away?" I said, "Ur parents."

Q: What’s worse than fingerbanging your sister?

A: Finding your dad's wedding ring.

Why did the orphan fall out of a tree?

They thought their parents would catch them.

Why is it okay to hit orphans?

It's not like they can tell their parents.

One day an orphan threw a boomerang. It's not the only thing that didn't come back.

A homeless kid walked up to another kid and said, "I have what you don't." He said, "(Parents)."

And the kid said, "Your right, I do have parents," and walked away.

What is the difference between an apple and an orphan?

The apple actually got picked.

What's Moby Dick's dad's name? Papa Boner.

Why do orphans hate geometry? Cuz it reminds them that their parents are poley-gone.

I asked my mom why dad was so pale and sick. She said, "Shut the fuck up and keep digging!"

What's an orphan's favorite game?

"Who's your daddy?"

(Go look up the game)

Why can’t orphans be criminals?

Because they’re not wanted!