Family jokes
How are you and an orphan similar?
Both of your fathers are invisible.
Why are orphans bad at baseball?
They can't find home.
We found out my grandpa is addicted to Viagra. No one is taking it harder than my dad.
Doctor: "I am so sorry, I cannot see you today."
Orphan: "Oh, okay. What about tomorrow?"
Doctor: "No, I can't see you ever."
Orphan: "Why?"
Doctor: "Because I am a family doctor."
Why can't an orphan get 5 stars in GTA? Because they are not wanted.
Hollow Knight Meme
Why can’t orphans be criminals?
Because they’re not wanted!
Roses are red,
Potatoes are brown,
Your mom's so hot,
I put her down.
The twin towers are like your father, they're both gone and will never come back.
What’s an orphan’s favorite beer?
Fosters.
What’s the difference between an ant and an orphan?
The ant knows where home is.
Four men were asked if they could have something with their cousin for €500.
The first replied: "For 500€? Of course!"
The second said: "I'd do it for free!"
The third replied: "I would even give her 200€!"
The fourth replied: "With my ex? Never!"
What’s the worst joke ever? Your parents’ relationship.
I love telling dad jokes. He always laughs.
Kid: *runs down the street* HELP ME!
Officer: You OK, kid?
Me: Don't worry! He's my nephew, there was a big spider.
Officer: Oh, OK, ma'am. *walks off*
When officer leaves:
Me: *gets whip* What did I say about leaving the basement?
What foods are orphans allergic to? Homemade food.
Where do orphans shop for home appliances?
What's the difference between your dad and a boomerang?
The boomerang comes back.
Why can't orphans ride a bike?
'Cause their parents won't follow them.
Some people are such treasures that you sometimes just wanna bury them.
What are two plus sides to being an orphan?
1. All your snacks are family sized.
2. No one can make jokes about your mama.