Family jokes

I don't know an orphan joke, but I bib cried last night.

Because I am an orphan.

Why do orphans not have cheese on their burgers? They don't have a dad to get milk.

Is it possible for an orphan to go on an away trip?

No, because they already are on one.

The teacher called Little Johnny to her desk. She said: “This essay you’ve written about your pet dog is exactly the same essay your brother has written.”

“Of course it is,” said Johnny. “It’s the same dog.”

Why can’t orphans play baseball?

Because they don’t know where home is.

If you’re bored, go punch an orphan. What are the parents gonna do?

My great-great-great grandpa killed Hitler.

Your momma's so fat, when I went to suck her titties, I got a mouth full of knee.

Your mom is heavier than Mariah can even carry.

Welcome to the Fast Food Divorce Center where yesterday's lies are today's fries.

"When your mom is pregnant and your best friend learns dad jokes."

Me:.....

What’s the difference between a child and someone who has been kidnapped?

One of them is a domesticated pet.

What's the difference between an orphan and an apple?

One's actually picked.

What does my family and the Twin Towers have in common? We both played Jenga.

What is the difference between an orphan and an apple?

Apples get picked.

I will never forget my grandfather's last words:

"Can you hold the ladder correctly, damn it!"

Why does the orphan do robberies?

Because he wants to be wanted.

Why do orphans love boomerangs?

They come back.

Why can't orphans play video games?

Because they can't access the home screen.

Why do sisters have to be in a relationship? Because you don’t have to worry about your car.