Family

Family jokes

What's worse than eating 5 raw oysters out of your grandmother's vagina?

Realizing you only put in 4.

  • 2
  • I will always remember my grandpa's last words: "Stop shaking the ladder, you cunt!"

    Billy got a bike and a soccer ball for his birthday from his uncle, but he was very upset. Why? Because he has no legs.

    What's the difference between Jesus and the baby in my basement?

    Jesus died a virgin.

    Yo mama's so dumb, her dad said, "You're driving me crazy," and she said, "I didn't know crazy was a place!"

    Why did the family get mad at the boy for eating at the funeral?

    While trying to season his food, he mistook his cremated grandfather for salt.

  • 3
  • When we were visiting the Hoover Dam, I started to get a bit hungry. I asked my parents, "Where's the dam snack bar?"

    A boy walks into the bedroom and sees mom and dad having sex. The boy says, "What are you doing?"

    "Baking a cake."

    The next day he walked up to his mom doing dishes.

    "Remember when you were making a cake? I LICKED UP ALL THE FROSTING."