Family jokes
Why is the iPhone X best for orphans?
There is no home button.
Fuck, my dad has cancer, lol.
Your mum's got big tits.
What do orphans use to make breakfast? My ass! 🤣🤣
Ur mum.
So, one day I walk up to my sister and tell her that she is adopted because she doesn't look like anyone in the family. She starts to cry. My mom asks why she's crying, and I say I told her she was adopted and I was there for the adoption, and we have papers. It was all a lie. She is not adopted, and everything is fine.
Little Susie had gotten her first period. She told her mom, and they bought pads.
The next month, Susie's mom asked if she had her second one. Suzie said no, and her mom fainted!
Why did the blind kid drop his ice cream? He got run over by his mom.
Jack and Jill went up the hill to do it in the water. Jack slipped, his condom ripped, and now they have a daughter.
My boy is so distracted and the kids are doing great. I will be make $500000.
My sister is so annoying. She won $10,000 to go to hell.
Bob: Kanye West.
Dad: No, but I can East.
Dad: "I'm giving all your toys to the orphanage."
Kid: "Why are you doing that?"
Dad: "So you won't get bored there."
Nutted in my shoes, now my kids are taking a walk.
You're mum.
A child has diarrhea and asked his mom for a Viagra. "Why in the world do you want that?" she asked him. He looks at her and says, "Well, that's what you gift dad when his shit won't get hard."
Yo mama so fat that when she sat on the couch, the couch got destroyed.
Molly Burke and her mom were on a walk. Molly walked into a bar; her mom laughed and walked under it.
Your adopted.
Mom: Daddy, stop!
Me: No!
Mom: Ok, I just wanted you to do it like your father.