Eye jokes

What does a baby in a blender look like?

I don’t know, I close my eyes when I masturbate.

The inmates are yelling 12...12...12... in the courtyard.

A man walking by is interested why the keep chanting 12...12...12... so he sticks his head through the fence and the inmate poked the man in the eye.

Moment later they start chanting 13...13...13...

What do you call a fish with no eye?

A one-eyed fish, you smart ass!

Puns, that's how I roll.

What do you call an animal with 3 eyes, 2 mouths, 6 noses, and 4 ears?

Yo mama's so stupid that she studied for her eye test.

Why can't the blind man see? Because he can't see.

I have 3 eyes, 2 ears, and 6 mouths, what am I?

UGLY!

I spy with my little eye nothing because I only have two normal-sized eyes.

How long does it take to blow up a baby in the microwave?

I don't know, I close my eyes when I masturbate...

Why do women rub their eyes in the morning?

Because they don't have balls.

"What do you call a deer with no eyes?" -- "No-eye-deer."

What do you call a fish with no eye?

Fsh.