Joe mama so fat, hello kitty said goodbye.
Yo mama is so fat that when she fell, I didn't laugh, but the sidewalk cracked up.
Your ma is so slow, it took her 9 months to make a joke.
You're so scary that even your hairline ran away.
I was going to talk about your chin, but I wasn't sure which one to write about.
Yo mama is so fat, they had to flood the Super Bowl to give her a bath.
Me: Mom, the weight scale wants your weight, not your phone number!
Your mom is so ugly, she made the devil go to church.
A deaf couple wants to know when to have sex.
The wife says, "If you want to have sex, squeeze my tits once. If you don't want to have sex, squeeze my tits twice."
The husband says, "OK, if you want to have sex, pull my dick once. If you don't want to have sex, pull my dick 437 times."
As a scientist, I confirm that you speak too fast. It has a speed of 1 bullshit per second.
Your kid is so annoying, he makes his Happy Meal cry.
Chuck Norris once stared a basilisk in the eye, and it DIED!
Yo mama's so fat, she stepped on a scale and it said: "To be continued."
Yo mama so fat, she is 4 feet tall laying down.
Yo mama so fat she ate Saturn and mistook it for bubble gum.
Your mama is so short, she does backflips under her bed.
Roses are red, pussies are wet, when it goes in he gets upset. She said it's too small, so that's all. But later that day, he wanted to say, "Every time I play, no one complains, so she was just lying." She started flying, went out of her seat, the skirt went up, the greatest of them all. Everyone said, "Fly away big chunky balls."
Your mama so fat, when Santa saw her he said, "Ho, ho, holy s***!"
Chuck Norris one-shot down a German fighter plane by pointing his finger at it and yelling "bang!"
I was cooking eggs the other day. It was very egg-citing, although, I was exaggerating, but, if you think that wasn’t funny to you, then you’re hard-boiled. That’s all for today, yolks! So I said before several cats starting fighting, that sh*t was a catastrophe. These kittens were all like “You’ve gotta be kitten me.” Meanwhile, in the ocean, they just waved, see what I did there? You shore you didn’t? Oh, alright, that’s okay bud- I guess these ocean puns are too deep for you. No? Okay- but, you know why the skeleton was lonely, eh? Oh, cause he had no body. Why didn’t the skeleton ask the girl out? He didn’t have the guts. What did the skeleton do to his gf? He boned her. No? Alright. Those didn’t make you laugh? Maybe I should hit your funny bone.
