Event jokes

The British Society of Psychics' annual convention had to be cancelled due to unforeseen circumstances!

Your mom is so fat, she brought a spoon to the Super Bowl.

You were born on a highway in a car crash, I wonder why.

The wedding was so beautiful, even the cake was tiers.

When you're in the World Trade Center and you connect to airplane wifi.

I hate stairs. They are always up to something.

I love stairs. They are always down to party.

Yo hairline is too pushed back, looking like it got slapped up by Will Smith.

Grandma: When we go to a wedding, whispers, "You're next."

At a funeral, I whisper, "You're next."

September 11th is the superior birthday because no one forgets it. #flexingonyoubitches ;)

For my birthday on Sept. 11 this year, I just want a plane chocolate cake.

My wife is so fat, I took her to the Macy's Day parade. They attached ropes to her.

Your hairline pushed back lookin' like you got slapped up by Will Smith.

10, being in the middle, tried to prevent 9/11 from getting closer.

Sorry, I meant 9 and 11.

Why were the Twin Towers so mad?

Because they ordered pepperoni, but instead they got plain!

We were making jokes before the second tower even fell!

Watching the 9/11 documentaries is just watching a kill cam.

Yesterday I went to a party at my friend’s house. Everyone was dressed as birthday candles. It was a blowout.

Why is September 11th the best birthday? Because no one ever forgets it!

You're so ugly, even the World Trade Center got a better transformation than you.

My birthday's on September 11th, I'm gonna turn the fuck up and throw a banger! Then rub my tits in birthday cake frosting!!! WOOOOOOOOO!