Ethics jokes
If you’re bored, go punch an orphan. What are the parents gonna do?
Why is it okay to hit orphans?
It's not like they can tell their parents.
God sent a kid to the principal's office for giving a blind kid sunglasses and said, "Don't let the sun damage your eyes!"
How do you help a starving cannibal?
You give him a hand!
If a pregnant emo kills herself, is that murder-suicide or just abortion?
What is black, white, and red all over? An interracial abortion.
I decided to make a charity bungee jump for the local disabled. It's called "Spastics on Elastics."
Babies are like airstrikes; they get aborted.
My grandfather tells me I'm too reliant on technology. I called him a hypocrite and unplugged his life support.
What’s the difference between drugs and kids?
I don’t do drugs.
If 80% of all suicides in the UK are males, and women want equality, then maybe they should just kill themselves.
Abortion is a difficult topic for me.
On one hand I support it because it kills children.
On the other hand, it gives women a choice.
There were four men eating dinner on the Titanic when it hit the iceberg.
The waiter said, "We have to get to the lifeboats!"
The teacher said, "What about the kids?"
The lawyer said, "Fuck the kids."
The priest said, "Do you think we'll have time?"
When you're banging the class slut and the school shooter says to leave his corpses alone.
A priest asks a convicted murderer on the electric chair, "Do you have any last request?"
"Yes," said the murderer, "Will you hold my hand?"
What's the advantage of being a grade A paedophile? You know it's not period blood.
What's the similarities between dark humor and cancer?
It's funnier when kids get it.
My grandpa said my generation relies too much on technology.
Then I unplugged his life support. :)
Why is it you donate one kidney, you're a hero, but donate four or five and people run and call the police?
Mom told me drugs are my enemies.
Jesus said to like your enemies.
Yay, I can like drugs then!