How can you make a woman scream your name when you have sex with her?
Change your name to "Rape."
Ethics Jokes
9 year olds can consent. That’s like 18 divided by 2.
If you're bored, just go hit an orphan. What are they gonna do? Tell their parents?
God sent a kid to the principal's office for giving a blind kid sunglasses and said, "Don't let the sun damage your eyes!"
Why is it okay to hit orphans?
It's not like they can tell their parents.
How do you help a starving cannibal?
You give him a hand!
In the hospital, they need to keep the disabled patients' rooms cooler than the other patients' rooms.
Why?
They need to keep the vegetables cool and crisp.
There was one kid that came home from school and asked his mom what dark humor was.
She said, "Well son, do you see that guy over there across the road? Go give him a high-five."
Son said, "But I can't see."
Mom said, "That's the point."
If you’re bored, go punch an orphan. What are the parents gonna do?
I have a better method of abortion than currently used. It's like a regular one, except you can get free food out of it... We're about to give baby-back ribs a whole new meaning.
What’s the difference between chocolate and people?
You can’t buy people nowadays.
Why do white people own a lot of pets?
Because they're not allowed to own people anymore.
I went to a library and I started to make fun of a disabled guy. He started crying, and I said, "Stand up for yourself!"
I have a huge thought: if Satan punishes people who are bad, doesn't that make him good?
If you want KFC, pour water on a poor person outside our restaurant and film it.
Doctor: I’m sorry, I can’t see you today.
Orphan: Oh, how about tomorrow?
Doctor: No, I can’t ever see you.
Orphan: Why?
Doctor: Because I’m a family physician.
I figure it's ok to hit orphans.
What are they gonna do? Go tell their parents?
I have a question: Does aging affect corpses, too?
Just asking to know if I still count as a pedophile or not!
What is a pedophile's favorite age range?
9-11.
Babies are like airstrikes; they get aborted.
