My gf told me she was pregnant, so I punched her in the stomach.
She asked me why the hell I did that. I told her I wanted to let her know I’m pro abortion.
My favorite species is a cheetah because
Ima cheet-ah on the test.
In History class, the teacher taught a lesson about serial killer Albert Fish. Back in the early 20th century, Fish reportedly kidnapped, ate, and raped over 100 kids. He mainly chose victims who were either retarded or black. Further on the lesson, the teacher explained how in those days, black people were socially not equal with white people, and how people with mental illness were not accepted and treated properly due to a lack of knowledge of mental health.
One of the students raised their hand and said, “You ought to be arrested.” The teacher confusedly asked, “Why?” The student explained, “Because you’re thinking like Albert Fish.”
I don't get why people don't like my abortion jokes. Do they have a stick up their ass? Wait, that's the other hole.
Here is a good joke: asking for consent before sex.
What’s the best thing about 26 year olds?
There are 20 of them.
God died for your sins, so basically if you don't sin then Jesus died for nothing.
If raping someone is sexual harassment, then is raping a rapist inverted harassment?
I think God is cool with abortion.
After all, he did kill his only son.
I was going to tell a joke about babies, but I decided to abort.
What's the name of a cannibal's favorite all-you-can-eat buffet? Planned Parenthood!
What's the difference between an abortion clinic and a computer? Ctrl+Alt+Delete.
Orphan jokes protest. Anonymous.
Orphan jokes are just funny so stop trying to ruin our fun!
Comments:
Gwen: Stop! It is not funny. Orphans are just out their cold, weak, and need someone! And the jokes are not funny!
Shut up: Shut up!
Liv: Gwen stop!!
Gwen: SHUT UP BITCH!!!!!!!!!
An eye for an eye will make the whole world blind...
...but it will allow ugly people to get laid.
Why can't I touch little old women, but nursing home nurses can?
If you're bored, punch an orphan. What are they going to do? Tell their parents?
In Denver, the members of a Sunday-school class were asked to set down their favorite biblical truths.
One youngster laboriously printed: “Do one to others as others do one to you.” —Lee Olson, The Denver Post
"It's not a war crime if you win the war."
- Sun Tzu, The Art of War
Q. Why didn't Tracy Latimer enjoy her trip to Vancouver?
A. She had to go to GasTown.
Jack and Jill wanted some pills.
So they went to the dealer; he saw they were kids and said, "Fuck this shit," then Jack rocked his ass and took all the good shit except birth control pills.
