Ethics jokes
If you think about it, taking candy from a baby is good because candy is bad for babies.
Did you hear about the guy who got fired for having sex with his clients?
He was a great veterinarian.
I regret my abortion.
I didn’t know child labor was an option.
If a pregnant emo kills herself, is that murder-suicide or just abortion?
There were four men eating dinner on the Titanic when it hit the iceberg.
The waiter said, "We have to get to the lifeboats!"
The teacher said, "What about the kids?"
The lawyer said, "Fuck the kids."
The priest said, "Do you think we'll have time?"
I know how to cut down on Medicare expenses.
Lock Alzheimer's patients in dog cages when they misbehave.
I'd tell a child abuse joke, but I forget the punchline.
Q. Why couldn't Terri Schiavo give good blow jobs?
A. She didn't know how to swallow.
I should probably stop making abortion jokes.
After all, the aborted babies aren't laughing.
Some people think jokes about child abuse are funny.
I'm not sure if I think that, but they do seem to hit different.
It's not rape if you say "April Fools!"
Incest.
When your genealogy chart is a straight line.
What do slinkies and the handicapped have in common?
They are the most fun when pushed down a flight of stairs.
If a baby dies in the womb, is it considered suicide?
I had sex with a disabled girl. You can say I handiclapped those cheeks.
What’s the difference between chocolate and people?
You can’t buy people nowadays.
"The dad was so horny he wanted to have sex with his wife, but his wife said no, so he fucked his daughter."
It's not incest if you're adopted.
I'd tell a bad baby joke, but I decided to abort.
What is a pedophile's favorite age range?
9-11.