Whats the difference between the twin towers and the poeple at the old folks home. They both collapsed
A programmer pushes a stroller through the park. An elderly couple comes along: "Is it a boy or a girl?" The programmer replies, "Yes."
My elderly relatives liked to tease me at weddings, saying, “You’ll be next!” They soon stopped though, once I started doing the same to them at funerals.
What does an 80-year-old woman taste like?
Depends
Elderly man: can I get a discount please, I fought in world war 2..
Cashier: sure!
Elderly man: danke
What's the worst part about burning your vegetables before dinner?
Explaining what happened to the nursing home while you're hungry.
What do old people have when they are sick.
A going away party.
jokes are like your grandparents, old and dead.
WHat store has the most vegetables... A nursing home
What is my favorite thing about my grandpa? His life insurance
When I go to weddings old people will tell me I'm next but when I go to funerals I tell old people they're next.
What does an eighty year old woman have in between her boobs that a twenty year old woman doesn't?
A belly button.
What song was played at the flatulent centenarian's birthday? Candle in the Wind!!
what's the difference between me and an old man no one pulled my life support
I remember my grandads last words. "Are you still holding the ladder."
"Did you hear about the flasher who exposed himself to two elderly ladies in Central Park? One had a stroke. The other couldn’t quite reach."
corona be like: eliminating half the population of boomers faster than Thanos *snap*
An old lady was low on money because she had spent all of her money on clothes. So she decided to go to the bank. She walked up to the guy at the desk. She asked if he could check her balance. He asked a few questions to the old lady. Like her weight and her height. He asked her if she had done any exercise recently. She was very confused. She got angry and asked the man again to check her balance. So he stood up, walked next to her and pushed her over. He came to the conclusion that she had a low balance
Did you know what my grandpa wanted for christmas? A new ass because his one has crack on it.
so i walked up to my grandma and i said what color would u be on a rainbow cupcake she just turned 61 ok ok so im like 'i got i got ok ok' she like: ok what color" i say:"grey"
