Education jokes
I was walking down the street one day, and I passed the gun store. I walked in, and everything was half off. I didn’t know back-to-school sales had started already!
Why don’t spiders go back to school?
Because they learn everything on the web.
Little Johnny once was at a camp and asked his teacher if he could sleep with her because he was homesick, so the teacher said yes. A few seconds later, Little Johnny asked if he could run his finger in her bellybutton, and she said yes.
A few seconds later, she moaned and felt so good, but it was not his finger putting it down her bellybutton; it was his dick and her penis.
How did Helen Keller's parents punish her?
They stuck her in a round room and told her to find the penny in the corner.
How did Helen Keller dance? Very Bad.
How did Helen Keller draw? With her hand.
What did the dumb kid call ratios?
A type of cereal.
When my bro says "YOUR MOM" when I'm talking when I'm at school, and my friend says "YOUR MOM," me punches him;-;
Alright class, the person who answers my next question gets to go home.
Then a guy throws a pencil. The teacher asks, "Who threw that pencil?" "I did, I get to go home."
The teacher is asking you a question.
Teacher: "If your biggest dream came true, what would you be?"
Me: "Dead."
Did you hear about the mathematician who's afraid of negative numbers?
He'll stop at nothing to avoid them.
Why did the girl rage badly when she got an D- on her essay?
Because the teacher said she missed all her periods.
My (at the time) boyfriend told our chemistry teacher that blood is corrosive to steel.
Anyways, my sharpener isn’t working because the blade has been too badly damaged from something else...
My math teacher asked me what a liked term was. I told her I couldn't say, never experienced it.
School is a lot like boot camp. The only difference is that you don't have to get deployed to get shot at.
The good thing about being gay in school is that you can be the best student and still get all the D's.
Today, I had an exam in school. When I was done, I raised my hand and yelled, “Pisstiano Penaldo!”
My teacher smiled and took my paper. She knew I was finished.
Why can’t you give an orphan homework?
Because they don’t have a home to do it in.
Son - Dad, I've been expelled from school for having sex with a girl in my class.
Dad - Son, that's the 2nd school this year! Maybe teaching isn't for you!
Halloween joke:
What do you get when you cross a vampire with a teacher?
A blood test.
When I got to school, they gave me an Acer laptop, so I went up to the teacher and aced her.