Education jokes

Today we had a test on September 11th in school. I got a 9/11.

What's yellow and can't swim but screams when it goes under?

A school bus full of kids.

What's the difference between a teacher and a train?

The teacher says, "Spit out your gum," but a train says, "Chew chew!"

Why did the rapper go to school?

To get a degree in RHYMEOLOGY!

Teacher's pen is RED, our pen is BLUE, she is marking an EGG on my marksheet, left with questions and no CLUE.

Are you Spanish, because I will say "Hola."

Do you go to a biblioteca? Also, in Spanish, you will never guess the word "biblioteca." Find it, I dare you.

Where do math teachers go on vacation? Times Square.

The teacher asks her class, "What is sex?" and Little Jonny stands up and says, "Sex is the temptation caused by the sensation when a boy sticks his location into a girl's destination. Did you get my explanation or do you need a demonstration?" and the teacher fainted.

Me to friend: I'm homeschooled.

Friend: If I was homeschooled, I'd kms.

Me: Oh, I already tried that.

What is the part of school with all the autistic people called? Downtown.

Teacher: Why did the skeleton know the weather outside?

Student: 'Cause he could feel it in his bones.

Teacher: No, he read the weather report, you fucking idiot.

Teacher said, "You never do your homework," so I shot her 7 times with a M1 BushDid911 and replied, "It's all in my backpack, can you grade it please?"

I found a key that works for every door at my school.

What did the Teacher say to the orphan?

"I am calling your parents!"

I found this at school.

Teacher: Is anyone missing?

Orphan: My parents.

Guess what, everybody? I'm dumb in math. I'm dumb and stupid at math.

I was struggling on a math test when a girl in a wheelchair leaned over and said, "Hey, this is the easiest thing I've done all day."

I was triggered, so the next day when we were doing the pledge, I leaned over and said, "This is the easiest thing I've done all day!"

Teacher: Ok class, good morning. We are going to start off by asking what kind of sound animals make.

Teacher: Ok, what sound does a pig make?

Class: A cow says "moo moo."

Teacher: Good!

Teacher: What does a sheep make?

Class: A sheep says "baa baaa."

Teacher: Good! Now, what does a pig say?

Little Johnny: A pig says, "Put your hands up and get against the wall, you stupid mother fucker!"

I was high in high school, but not as high as the people jumping from the buildings.